1. Your mornings involve a cost-benefit analysis of sleep vs. not looking like a homeless vagrant.
2. Regardless of your official title, your role is nothing more than just a Powerpoint Slide Monkey.
3. You spend your life writing meaningless jargon you learnt at business school onto slides. Everyone knows that cash cows don't actually exist in real life.
4. You smile meekly as you get assigned the most boring tasks no one else wants. Again.
5. And you get shipped off to random locations at the most inconvenient times. Most often when you have a hot date lined up.
6. Finishing your presentation deck feels like a huge victory...
7. Until it's met with derision by your manager. And you're told to change it again. For the 20th time.
8. You have no space to run away from your coworkers for those embarrassing bodily functions / times when you need to be alone.
9. As if a normal work day isn't enough, you sometimes have to endure dinners with co-workers where conversations run out after the appetiser.
10. No matter how hard you try to stay organised, you inbox just gets more and more clogged up.
11. You never realised it was possible to squeeze so many meetings into a day. How does that leave time for procrastination or work?
12. Speaking of meetings, you're nothing more than a wallflower. Your ideas aren't even heard for water to be poured over them.
13. You feel an overwhelming sense of euphoria when someone cancels a meeting. 30 more minutes to yourself!
14. Your only escape during the day is to look at cute animal pictures online. And wonder why work doesn't do itself.
15. Escaping the office at lunchtimes feels, temporarily, like an escape into a fantasy world.
16. You have to deal with brown-nosing, vacuous douche bags who seem to climb the corporate ladder so effortlessly.
17. Meanwhile, your efforts to woo senior management is riddled with failure.
18. No matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to climb the greasy pole of corporate success.
19. Two years in, you've already waved goodbye to any hopes and dreams you had cherished throughout childhood
20. Instead, the only dreams you have now are when you're asleep.
21. Sadly, there's just not a simple magic spell which can take away all the drudgeries of corporate life!
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