93 Thoughts I Had While Seeing 'Cats' For The First Time
An array of thoughts about the musical that lives on... forever...
93 Thoughts I Had While Seeing 'Cats' For The First Time
1. Am I really seeing a musical about and starring Cats?
2. Yes, yes I am.
3. Do I drink before?
4. Yes, yes I do.
5. Did I drink too much?
6. Nope.
7. Meow.
8. I think I want a t-shirt.
9. Ooh string lights in the house!
10. Oh no, string lights in the house.
11. That means there will be some form of house lights in the show.
12. And usually that means that actors come into the house.
13. Sorry, I mean Cats.
14. Meow.
15. I really hope the Cats don’t come into the house.
16. I know they will.
17. There are adults wearing Cat ears.
18. …says the girl who wore mouse ears at DisneyLand.
19. IT’S DIFFERENT.
20. The lighting designer’s name is Natasha Katz. That was 100% on purpose.
21. Ooh it’s starting!
22. Classic black out.
23. There are eyes on stage.
24. Like cats.
25. There are eyes in the house.
26. THERE ARE EYES AT THE END OF MY ROW.
27. IT’S A CAT-PERSON.
28. Oh they’re not that scary.
29. Space Cats?
30. Are they landing from space?
31. What the hell is a Jellicle?
32. That’s a LOT of cats.
33. HOW MANY CATS?!
34. Am I supposed to remember the names of all of these cats?
35. They must be so tired.
36. I bet they had rehearsal before this show. I’m tired just watching them.
37. Did they get any say in their cat coloring?
38. Probably not. Costume designers don’t like input.
39. Gumby cat? Gumbie cat?
40. I feel like we’re still in the exposition part of the story, but it’s been 30 minutes already.
41. Oh look, another cat we haven’t met yet.
42. Grizabella is the Eponine of Cats.
43. Do you hear the Cats sing?
44. Meow.
45. Oh the ball is beautiful. Good use of string lights!
46. Oh they’re in the audience again. Nice kitty.
47. Ooh Memory! I know this song!
48. Oh it’s the short version.
49. Is that Selena Gomez? Nicole Sherzinger?
50. Oh. Leona Lewis. Do I know her? Should I?
51. Every time I get invested in a scene, I remember they’re just cats.
52. The set design is awesome. It really makes them look small!
53. 20 minute intermission?!?!?!?!
54. I don’t want a t-shirt anymore.
55. I would if it didn’t have the “Cats” logo on it.
56. Ooh there’s a cat crawling on stage. I bet we’re back.
57. We’re back! That was a short 20.
58. Thank you, ten.
59. Gus the Theater Cat! I know this one too!
60. Oh my god, Asparagus is the cutest name for a cat.
61. I once met a cat named Toast.
62. I’d like to have a cat named Olive.
63. Meow.
64. What is that cat doing?
65. Did he just commit cat-suicide?
66. (“Unclear,” says my friend.)
67. Oh Memory again!
68. Oh wait, nope.
69. Oh my god he’s flying in from the ceiling.
70. Oh my god his jacket’s lighting up.
71. Ok cats can’t do that.
72. HIS LIGHT UP JACKET IS CHANGING COLORS.
73. This show is amazing.
74. I’m definitely getting a t-shirt.
75. And cat ears.
76. Ok no I’m not.
77. This woman in the front row has stood up TWICE now to give a standing ovation.
78. Yes, she’s wearing ears.
79. Yes, she’s by herself.
80. Ok but he IS magical.
81. Memory AGAIN?!
82. Oh, it’s the real one.
83. Oh, it’s sad.
84. I’m having feelings.
85. BUT WAIT, they’re cats.
86. Yeah, of course the sad cat with the song that gets reprised 300 times gets another life.
87. Where are they going?
88. Oh right, space cats go back to space.
89. SHE’S FLYING.
90. Seriously where is she going.
91. Bye kitty!
92. Oh it’s over.
93. Was there a story? I feel like the whole thing was just “Hey! Meet this Cat!”