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21 Signs You'd Make An Amazing Rich Person

You aspire to have an oil painting of yourself hanging in your home one day.

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1. You aspire to have an oil painting of yourself to greet people when they enter your home.

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2. You instinctually gravitated towards the most expensive Apple watch because your aesthetic is ~new money~.


3. And you hate the Buchanans from The Great Gatsby because they're old money.

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What have they ~earned~ other than this can of whoop ass.

4. You've designed enough Sims to *know* you'd make a great overlord.

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5. The real reason you want to live in a mansion is so you can make the biggest room in the house a replica of the library in Beauty And The Beast.


6. And also so you can have a pool house and pretend like you're Will Smith in Fresh Prince.


7. You fantasize about being close enough to the stage at a Beyoncé concert that her sweat drips on you.

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8. You LOVE the idea of Pimp My G6.

9. And you'd hire Xzibit to make the experience authentic as fuck.

10. You'd finance the queer Channing Tatum / Idris Elba romcom that world deserves.

11. Your friend Mr. Benjamin could probably convince Ben and Jerry's to name a flavor after you.


12. You're already saving up to hire Morgan Freeman to delivery the eulogy at your funeral (after you've lived fast and died young).

13. Your summer home would be IN Disneyworld.

14. And your winter home is a castle somewhere in Great Britain that you customize into your own personal Hogwarts.

Warner Bros

15. You'd get a pair of Alexander McQueen shoes to simply put on your feet because no real human can walk in those.

16. You'd get your weed from Snoop's guy.

17. You'd never need to order bottle service because the first company you'd buy out is Dom Perignon.

18. And fill up your brand new Jacuzzi with it.

19. You're open to the idea of being an adult who rides segway, as long as it gets you to your Google board meeting.

20. You'd even be willing to buy those dumb boat shoes because looking stupid in those is worth having your own private yacht.



Universal Pictures

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