What Tom's Ford's 'Lips And Boys' Collection Tell You About Men

Each color in the 50 piece 'Lips and Boys' collection is rumored to be inspired by a man in Mr. Ford's life. With lipsticks as my inspiration, I decided to make snap judgements of men based on their names.

1. William

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William is a sensible beige.. of course. Not even Tom Ford could rid William of the stereo type.

-He went to boarding school and went on to go to an outstanding university (his dad obvi got him in). Willam never finished university because he NEVER finishes anything

-He was kind of a lacrosse legend in high school but got kicked off the team for possession of suspicious substances

-You can catch William dining at Ralph's in a cashmere cable knit sweater and fine suede loafers because that has been his uniform since he was in the womb

-William will break your heart. He will do it the way Warner did to Elle. Looking beautiful and in a luxury car

2. Alasdhair

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Oh Alasdhair, you beautiful, chiseled, son of a b***h!

-Alasdhair is the sultry and mysterious man at the bar that sends you drinks and leaves. Not a kiss, not a glance, just a really good drink.

-Alasdhair has a past like you and me. The 90s were hard. The thing that makes Alasdhair different? The fact that he had frosted tips and faded jeans and actually made them look good

-Alasdhair owns a yacht and spends his summers sailing around Southern Spain. Not only has he visited every town on the coast, but let's just say Alasdhair has also got to know the locals...

-Alasdhair works out, and boy does it show. A colonial woman could do her town's laundry on Alasdhair's perfectly tan washboard abs

3. Kyril

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Kyril is basically a Spice Girl.

-Kyril is the guy you want to be seen with. He knows everyone at the club and once he hits the dancefloor, the room is his. You go to the club with Kyril, but don't think he's leaving with you ;)

-Kyril always wears a deep v-neck t-shirt made out of the thinnest layer of cotton. When Kyril is around heads will turn and the man gives the people what they want

-Kyril has Cher on speed dial

-Kyril lives his life like a Hilton Sister at Burning Man. Kyril is free, wild, and unapologetically himself.. But he also happens to have an Amex Centurion Card and travels with a myriad of Louis Vuitton luggage (shhhh don't tell Tom)

4. Rafael

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Rafael is the man of every boy and girl's dreams. He's cultured, sensitive, sexy.. And did I mention sexy?

-Rafael is saucy. There is no denying it. He has an accent that is a mix between a Spanish lover and what I imagine God would sound like

-Rafael was a male model in his early twenties but was over it after a few years and dinners with Donatella Versace. Sometimes beautiful people just take things like this for granted

-Rafael will show you the world. Think Paolo and Lizzie in Rome except that this is your life all the mf time. Hottest resturaunt in town? Rafael has a table waiting! Wanna see Paris lit up at night? What time can Raf pick you up on his Vespa? HE IS JUST THAT KIND OF GUY!

-Most importantly, Rafael is a good guy. He's smart, sexy, loves his mom, and won't break your heart the way others do. You won't end up with Rafael, oh no, this man is a butterfly. You can't hold onto him too tight, or you'll crush him. Just enjoy the beauty of Rafael while he's with you and let the man soar

5. Didier

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Didier is kinda an a**hole. You have been warned..

-Didier lives in Paris. He scoffs at tourists and spends most of his days in a cafe with a cigarette talking about the fragility of life. He thinks we take life for granted and should all live like him

-How does Didier live? Well, on the top floor of a historic parisian building of course. Didier worked hard to get where he is. No one knows exactly how, but he wants us to trust that he worked.. Whatever you say Didier whatever you say

-Did we mention Didier can't be trusted?

-Didier would rather be seen wearing a fanny pack and a country flags of the world dad polo than eat fast food