Your Pretentious Younger Self Vs. Your Secure Older Self

For everyone who was frightened into snobbery in their teens.

1. Younger self: “I don’t listen to mainstream radio. All pop music is mass-market dreck.”

Kevin Tang

2. Current self: “Holy hell, Mariah Carey was actually good?”

Kevin Tang

3. You, early in college: “I only read Pynchon and The New Republic. Cartoons are for babies.”

Kevin Tang

4. You, late in college: watches cartoons all day, is a smelly baby.

(*The P Man and TNR are still good. Point is, you can like whatever you want.)

5. Younger self: eager to show off everything you know.

6. Older self: picks nose while eating Cheetos at work.


7. Your teen snob self: thinks that your wit exempts you from the duty of being kind.

Kevin Tang


8. Your older self: horridly embarrassed you were ever like that.

9. Snobby high school self: “80% of the art/movies/games/novels/companies out there are OVERRATED GARBAGE. I can totally do better.”


10. Older self: realize that making things is much, much harder than talking shit and throwing bricks.

11. Your young self’s idea of fancy writing: novel characters sighing down some Parisian avenue, ruing the lyrical names of trees while saying, “Ah, quite touché, mon frere.”


12. Your old self’s idea of fancy writing: anything but a cellist in Paris sniffing flowers, please.

13. Younger self: “My parents have LAME taste in music!”


14. Older self: secretly torrents all of parents’ music.

15. Your young self: angry that your favorite things became popular among the wrong people.

16. Your older self: glad that the hard-working talents behind your favorite things finally got the recognition they deserve.

17. Younger self: easily cowed by celebs, people with fancy titles and degrees.

Kevin Tang

18. Older self: knows there are geniuses and frauds from every walk of life.

19. Younger self: calls every show a “guilty pleasure.” Can’t watch anything without making fun of it.

20. Older secure self: no such thing as a guilty pleasure. Pleasure is pleasure.

21. Younger self:

22. Older self:

You’re too old to be frightened into snobbery anymore. And if you’re humble and still alive with curiosity, that’s totally OK.

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