1. Patronise the host nation
This applies especially to your introductory remarks, but it can be useful to sprinkle some through the rest of your commentary as well. Comment on how awfully well they've done hosting the tournament and how marvelous any new stadiums are.
2. Dealing with the unpronouncable
Many of the player's names in the tournament will be unpronounceable globs of consonants. You have a few options on how best to deal with this.
1. Have a go. This is a high-risk maneuver and you will run the risk of being mocked across social media. It is very important never to back down on a pronunciation. Once you've gone with a wrong one, stick it out until the end of the tournament as least. No one likes a quitter.
2. Use a clever substitute phrase. Traditionally, this would take the form of [Characteristic] / [Number/Position], for example "the big number 6", "the tricky left winger" or the "the fat keeper". Also acceptable are "the Tottenham player" assuming they play for Tottenham.
3. Discussing tactics
This is an important part of the job. There are only really two things you need to talk about.
1. Number of players in defence. Typically there are either three or four. If they have three, that is "unusual" or "continental". If there are four, always refer to them as a "flat back four". Sometimes they might be "caught square". It's not necessary to understand what that means.
2. Number of strikers. Typically this will be one or two. If a team with one striker isn't doing well, talk about how they should go "two up front" as if that will solve everything.
4. Complain about the ball
If they game isn't as exciting as it could be, a useful thing to discuss will be the ball. It is usually too light or behaves in strange ways when you kick it. Don't mention that the players will have had a long time to get used to it as this will ruin your point.
5. Falling back on regional stereotypes
With 32 teams in one tournament, it would be impossible to know things about all of them. Therefore, it can be handy to fall back on regional stereotypes about how those teams play:
African teams are physically imposing but lack tactical discipline.
East European teams are technically excellent but lack height / strength.
South European teams are flamboyant and talented but fragile.
North European teams are technically poor but have stamina and discipline.
Australia are shit.
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