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    Updated on Nov 26, 2019. Posted on Nov 3, 2019

    16 Tweets English Majors Will Feel Personally Attacked By

    It's lit...English lit.

    1.

    English majors only want one thing and it’s discussing

    2.

    (english major moving apartments) there’s a lot to unpack here

    3.

    English majors will name their bar trivia team “Tequila Mockingbird” and not get a single Literature question right

    4.

    PHILOSOPHY MAJOR: humanity is at risk STEM MAJOR: because global warming is affecting sea levels ENGLISH MAJOR: is it affecting or effecting

    5.

    If your party doesn't have seven rooms divided by color and a masked figure who symbolizes the notion that death is surely coming, don't bother inviting me

    6.

    LAWYER: Can you tell the court where you were the night of the murder ENGLISH TEACHER: I'm sure I CAN, yes LAWYER: Ugh. Please tell the court where you were the night of the murder ENGLISH TEACHER: Much better. I was killing the victim

    7.

    8.

    Me: hi! sorry it took a while to get back to you!! i was reading! Human: uh it's been 3 years??? Me: do you realise how many books there are

    9.

    english teachers thought it was such a flex to introduce us to edgar allen poe

    10.

    (WW1 1915) ENGLISH GENERAL: Plan? ENGLISH LIEUTENANT: Well, the trenches can be used to- ENGLISH MAJOR: to symbolise man's emptiness, yes...

    11.

    Hey I think you're Really cool I Like You A lot. Maybe we can H A N G Out... Or something. - e.e. cummings

    12.

    reading classics because you want to:🥰🥰🥰🥰🤩🤩🤩🤩 reading classics because school tells you to: 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮

    13.

    I wish I hadn’t taken AP English. Now everytime I’m on a street I’ve been on before I’m like “this is a metaphor” or “wow symbolism” but that is actually just something that happens when you live in an area

    14.

    [wedding] "and now the groom will read his vows" me: you make every day feel like a scholastic book fair

    15.

    one thing i love about jane austen is that she's like "riding a horse isn't sexy. u know what's sexy? CARRYING an EXTRA UMBRELLA. what's sexy is when a man DISTRACTS and REMOVES some INFANTS who are BOTHERING U. NOTICING when ur TIRED and finding u a SEAT...THAT is the sex"

    16.

    Is it lit? Yes, it's lit. It's English Lit, and I think you're going to love it.

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