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What 18 Normal Things Look Like When You're Hungover

Everything is so bright and ouch.

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1. "Bummer, time to get up," normal you says as your alarm clock rings.


"OH SWEET LORD, MY EARS!!!!" hungover you screams, and smashes the noisemaking thing.

2. "Better check the weather before I get dressed," normal you says, drawing back the curtains.


"OH SWEET LORD, MY EYES!!!!" hungover you screams, ripping the curtains shut and weeping bitterly.

3. "Oh well, I can always check the weather on my phone," normal you says.


"OH SWEET LORD, MY EYES!!!!" hungover you shrieks, and throws the evil lightbox away.

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4. "Mmm, coffee sounds good," says normal you.

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"GET AN IV, I NEED IT IN MY VEINS!!" hungover you yells at no one.

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5. "Ahh, time to hop in the shower," normal you says.


"Down the drain the vomit goes," hungover you sings weakly, and pets the shower wall lovingly.

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6. "Guess I better put some clothes on," normal you says, buttoning your shirt.


"This is fine," hungover you says, half naked.

7. "Time for breakfast," normal you says, grabbing a box of cereal.


"Time for a pillow," hungover you says, grabbing a box of cereal.

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8. "Morning, kitty," says normal you.

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"Morning, pillow," hungover you says, fluffing the kitty.

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9. "Ahh, the sweet smells of spring," normal you says, inhaling as you walk out of your apartment.

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"It all smells like cheap vodka," hungover you gags into the repulsive spring breeze.

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10. "Oh, excuse me," normal you says as you accidentally bump into a stranger.

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"ASIDE, BIOLOGICAL OBSTACLE," hungover you shouts.

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11. "Ugh, I hate it when the train is crowded," normal you says with a sigh.


"Where am I — what?" hungover you snorts, waking up on the train, three stops past your station.

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12. "Better hop on the escalator," says normal you.

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"I'm fine, don't help me, I'm fine," hungover you says, flailing.

13. "There are the office bathrooms," normal you says.


"To the nap room!" hungover you says, falling asleep on a toilet.

14. "Oh, here comes my boss, better look busy," normal you says, typing furiously.


"Hello, fellow human," hungover you mumbles, not realizing that you haven't turned your computer on yet.

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15. "I better get this done before lunch," normal you says, concentrating hard.


"It all hurts, I'm. Good-bye, I did love you," hungover you whispers to your computer screen.

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16. "I should really have a healthy lunch," normal you says, and heads for the salad bar.


"GIVE ME ALL THE GREASE!!" hungover you screams in the middle of your local deli, falling to your knees.

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17. "Oh, my mom is calling! Hi, mom!" says normal you.


"Mom, my life is in pieces, mom," hungover you says into the phone, not noticing that you never pushed the green "answer" button.

18. "Man, today is flying by," says normal you.

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"It has to be close to 5 by now — HOW IS IT ONLY 1 P.M.?! I need a drink," hungover you sighs, defeated.

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