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15 Highly Scientific Reasons You Should Never Visit Mars

Pure science.

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1. If you go to Mars, your face will get huge and your eyes will explode.

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2. Like, look.

3. When you're on Mars, the walls of reality will come crashing down.

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4. Mars has telepathic stomach-babies, and you'll have to hang out with them.

Carolco Pictures

5. Mars will freak you out, Mars is freaky.

6. Freaky shit goes down on Mars.

Carolco / Via giphy.com

7. Mars will give you paranoid delusions.

8. YOU WON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE ON MARS.

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9. And no one will be able to tell you.

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10. The public transportation on Mars is so unreliable.

11. And the jewelry situation is seriously stuck in the '90s.

Carolco / Via snakelamb.tumblr.com

12. Mars is too windy.

13. The parties on Mars totally suck.

Carolco / Via sewerhawk.tumblr.com

14. Mars boogers are way more intense than Earth boogers.

15. You can't even really go to Mars, because Mars is a dream. MAYBE.

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