Recently, Reddit user u/Impossible-Fold801 asked the women of the Reddit community: "What are your smaller relationship boundaries that you've learned over the years?"
And let me tell you, a lot of women didn't hold anything back. They revealed personal boundaries that are important to them when it comes to romantic relationships — some might be considered "small" or somewhat "unique," but in all honesty, they're relatable as heck.
So, here are some "small" relationship boundaries that just aren't acceptable to women:
1. "Someone who runs tests on me to see where I stand in the relationship instead of communicating (for example: not talking to me all day to see if I'll notice or reach out to them)."
2. "I no longer date/sleep with people who have a problem with period sex. It’s fine that some people don’t like it — it's completely understandable. Those people are just not compatible with me, though."
"I’m usually so ravenously horny during my period, and it’s the time when I most want to take my time and really enjoy sex. I never thought about it, but this would 100% be a dealbreaker for me as well."
3. And: "I think for me, what's become unacceptable is people who are bothered by unshaved legs while having sex. Maintaining my body hair under the eyebrows is just too time consuming, potentially expensive, and always painful. I’m done."
4. "Please do not make me make all of the decisions — I don't know what I want to eat, and I don't care what we watch. Can you please make these decisions 50% of the time? I make decisions all day at work, and I just...can't all the time at home."
"I've actually gotten snippy when I ask what they want for dinner (when I've been doing all of the cooking for weeks) and I hear: 'Idk, whatever you want.' Honestly, if I'm asking you what you want for dinner, it's not because I care what you want — it's because I'm tired of making the decisions."
5. "I have pets, and you're not allowed to just 'tolerate them' — you must enjoy them. If you can’t stand my dog cuddling you or the tortoise begging for a banana, then nope."
6. "I do not acknowledge what happens in bathrooms. Pee is okay, but I don't do other stuff in there. Please go along with this — do not try and catch me on the toilet, or try to tell me how it's important to be comfortable with each other. This is a thing that should never be discussed — ever!"
7. "Please don't talk to me for 15 minutes after I wake up, and please don't ask me questions for 30 minutes. My brain is still smooth and hasn't gone online yet."
"Girl, yes! I've been married for almost 30 years, and it took a while to convince my hubby it was in his best interest to caffeinate me fully before speaking. Now, he brings me coffee every day in the bathroom, then leaves!"
8. "When someone says 'I was joking' after saying something cruel, and then blames me for 'being sensitive.' Any cruelty masked as humor — and if they 'freak out' when I set a perfectly healthy boundary, it's a big red flag."
9. "We need our own chip bowls — no sharing because he ham-fists all of the damn chips before I can even get a third one."
"My partner is this way with popcorn. They shovel it down; whereas, I'm taking two or three pieces at a time — it drives me nuts. So, they get their own now, or they wait until I've had what I wanted."
10. "I couldn't stand when my husband told me what time it was when I was getting ready (fortunately, he stopped doing this after I told him I hated it). Every five minutes, he would say: 'It’s half past — you’ve got 10 minutes left.' I can manage my own time. I’m a fully-functioning adult with a job."
11. "Looking through my phone — he doesn't have my password."
"After coming out of a toxic relationship, this speaks loudly to me. Now, I'm in a very healthy relationship where I know his phone password only because I usually DJ when he drives. I feel comfortable leaving my phone in the room when I go away because I know I'll find it right how I left it."
12. "Don’t pick on me, even if it's just 'minor joking around.' I was traumatized by constant bullying by an older brother growing up, and I can't handle many 'light-hearted' jokes nowadays. I will explode."
13. "It's small, but when my opinions, interests, and recommendations are ignored. But, when one of their male friends share the exact same opinions, interests, and recommendations, it’s like he’s hearing it for the first time (and he's suddenly interested)."
"This has happened to me so many times. It really boils my blood when they come home excited about something I've recommended for months, and I just know they're about to tell me they heard it from someone else — never again."
14. "Lies (even about small things) are a hard no from me. I know so many people who think it's not a big deal if someone lies about their age, height, job, etc. on a dating app, but I've realized it's a big deal to me."
15. "Invade my personal space the moment I walk through the door after work. I won’t ignore him — I’ll give him a quick kiss to say hello, but I need space to unwind and scroll through TikTok for a little while if I want."
16. "Criticizing how I do things — you’re not my parent, my teacher, or my boss. I don’t give a fuck if your way is 'more efficient or effective.' If I need help or advice, I will ask for it. All you’re doing is stealing my joy in the moment to make yourself feel good."
"Yeah, this — one day my ex-boyfriend was complaining about my need to wear a coat. I said, with mature awareness and the kind of wit I wish I could muster more often: 'Funnily enough, I dress myself based on how I feel — not how other people feel.' It shut him up immediately."
17. And: "When they dismiss my feelings. My significant other used to say things like: 'You can choose not to be upset.' I told him how much of an asshole he was, and how bad that mindset was. He never used that line on me again."
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.