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43 Reasons To Hate The Beach

Fellow beach haters unite! Show this to your friends when they're trying to make you schlep to a broiling hellscape wasteland this summer.

1. Diapers

2. Used needles

3. Awkward wet marks from bathing suit

4. Gross exploding whales

5. Stinky wet towels and bathing suits in your laundry

6. Mean birds

7. Dead birds

8. Seagulls stealing your food

9. Seagulls stealing your shades

10. Seagulls pooping out the food they stole

11. Used condoms

12. Having to get in the water to pee

13. Sand in your shoes

14. Not getting sunblock in the middle of your back

15. Tanning

16. Sunscreen in your eyes

17. Hairy backs

18. More hairy backs

19. Wind

20. Seaweed

21. Thongs

22. Speedos

23. Dogs off the leash causing trouble

24. Wet dogs shaking water at you

25. Parking

26. Naked babies

27. Kids

28. Crowds

29. Humanity

30. Bad beach bodies

31. Good beach bodies

32. Crabs

33. Jellyfish

34. Portuguese Man O' Wars

35. Sharks

36. More sharks

37. So many sharks

38. Get the hell out of here, shark, I hate you so much

39. Sand around the rim of your soda can

40. Sand in your car..... FOREVER

41. Sand

42. More sand


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