Man Seeks Help Removing Ghost Cat From Washing Machine

    Any ideas?

    Katie Heaney
    by Katie Heaney

    BuzzFeed Staff

    Flickr: bonniecothran / Creative Commons

    Note: not actual ghost cat (probably???).

    Last night, on the /nosleep subreddit, user "fuckingghostcat" posted an urgent inquiry entitled "HOW DO YOU GET A FUCKING GHOST CAT OUT OF YOUR FUCKING WASHING MACHINE?? (NOT A JOKE!!!)"

    An excerpt:

    THERE IS A FUCKING CAT HAUNTING MY FUCKING WASHING MACHINE AND I WANT IT TO GTFO.So anyone have tips on how to do that?? I've tried everything I can think of and everything I can find online about how to get rid of ghosts, I'm talking candles and mirrors and weird rituals with herbs I can't pronounce and crucifixes and other stupid ridiculous shit and NOTHING WORKS and I even went to ask a priest at the church down the block but he just looked at me like I was crazy and I asked the fucking 1-800-PSYCHIC MEDIUM SCAMMER CHICK on the road to work but she said she only deals with humans, and is THAT the problem?HOW DO YOU EXORCIZE [sic] A CAT?? IS THERE A WAY TO COMMUNICATE WITH THE FELINE UNDEAD???
    -HOW DO I KNOW THERE IS A CAT: BECAUSE IT SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE A CAT WHEN IT CRIES ALL FUCKING NIGHT.-HOW DO I KNOW IT IS IN THE WASHING MACHINE: BECAUSE IT CRIES ALL FUCKING NIGHT AND WHEN I GET UP TO SEARCH FOR THE SOURCE OF THE SOUND ITS THE GODDAMN WASHING MACHINE. It also cries harder when I wash my clothes.-HOW DO I KNOW IT IS A GHOST: BECAUSE THERE ARE NO ACTUAL FUCKING CATS IN MY WASHING MACHINE. Or even in my apartment. I asked the neighbors and they don't have cats either, they can't hear any cats, cats are not allowed in the building, THERE ARE NO FUCKING ACTUAL CATS.
    -WHY DONT YOU JUST MOVE OUT: because rent is INCREDIBLY CHEAP its 5 minutes from where I work and I'm not going to let some ASSHOLE GHOST CAT chase me out of my apartment, we're supposed to be the superior fucking species.

    True... and fair.

    There's a lot more, such as other methods he's tried (attempting to record the cat, catch it on camera, having a friend stay over, and replacing the washing machine). None of them have worked. This is a man who needs our (the internet's) help.

    CAN YOU EXORCIZE [sic] A WASHING MACHINE?? THE CRUCIFIXES DIDNT WORK ON IT. ARE WASHING MACHINES CHRISTIAN. ARE CATS EVEN RELIGIOUS. WHY DO WE ASSUME ALL GHOSTS ARE CHRISTIAN AND/OR RELIGIOUS???????

    All good questions. Any advice on getting a ghost cat out of a washing machine? Leave it in the comments.

    Asking for a redditor.

    buzzfeed.com