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22 Things That Happen When You Get Into Knitting

I can listen while I knit, I swear!!

1. When you first learn to knit, you're like a baby foal taking its first shaky steps.

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It's a mess. There might be crying.

2. And it takes you about 100 years to complete a row.

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And even then, there are a bunch of mistakes. But it's fun!!

3. You become attached to an assortment of online how-to guides.

4. And sometimes you give up on something in seething frustration.

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5. But you keep trying, and while your first creations aren't exactly perfect, you love them anyway.

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Because they're YOURS, and never again will you make your second/third/fourth scarf.

6. You want to spend all your free time working on your current project.

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Leave me alone, or this hat/scarf/sweater/mitten set will NEVER be done in time for the holidays.

7. You feel a strong sense of joy and solidarity each time you find out someone you know also knits.

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Like Dumbledore!

8. You invite your new knitting pals over, just to talk and knit.

... and quickly discover there is perhaps no aphorism truer than "stitch 'n bitch."

9. Your needles become your go-to salve for any kind of physical/emotional ailment.

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It's like the saying, "Knit a cold, also knit a fever. And a breakup!"

10. And you become an evangelist for knitting's many healing properties.

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Seriously! It makes everything better!!!!

11. You start offering to make everyone you know a scarf. Who doesn't need a scarf???

12. And that's when you realize you didn't pick the CHEAPEST hobby in the world.

It's like ... $80 to make someone a scarf, sometimes???

13. But it's too late to turn back now. You're already addicted.

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Plus, it's like therapy. 2-in-1 therapy and scarf. It's actually a great deal.

14. When you forget your yarn bag you're a restless, nervous wreck.

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What did you DO with your hands before this??

15. Soon, the process becomes (almost) thoughtless, but in a good way.

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You barely need to look at what you're doing.

16. You become This Girl:

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Even if you're a guy. You're like, "Same."

17. Sometimes you leave the yarn store and it's like you blacked out while inside it.

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It's a fair question.

18. You buy patterns to things when you aren't even quite sure what they are.

It's like, a sausage case for a person? Or a muff. (haha.) Or a dog sleeping bag? Idk I just have to have it!!

19. You look up crafts online in the middle of the night in a red-eyed haze, assuring yourself you can make anything.

What if I did build myself a mansion???

20. ... And you stumble upon knitwear creations you wish you could unsee.

Noooo. Noooooooooo. Whyyyyyyyy.

21. There's that one thing you really want to make, that you hold out in front of yourself as the ultimate goal.

And when you get there, you'll have knitted All The Things.

22. But no matter what, you know you've started something you'll do forever.

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Even if it's just enough iterations of the very same scarf to insulate your whole house.