17 Things All Judgmental People Secretly Do, As Told By Owls

    Pettiness is a hoot.

    1. You try to give the impression that you’re non-judgmental and open-minded, but you know that secretly, you’re judging the hell out of everybody.

    2. Sometimes your judgment is justified, like when you see someone tip only $5 on a $150 restaurant bill.

    3. But let’s be honest: Most of the time, you’re just judging other people for the sake of judging.

    4. You’re constantly reminding yourself to be more sympathetic, because other people have problems and struggles that you are not privy to.

    5. But then you hear someone pronounce "nuclear" as "new-cue-ler," and you can feel your eye start to twitch.

    6. You have tried, without success, to remember that other people's business is not your business, and you should stay out of it.

    7. Until you see someone air out their personal drama on social media.

    8. The worst part of starting a new job is that you don’t immediately have an equally petty work friend to gossip with.

    9. So there’s no one to turn to when you find out that your boss’s favourite movie is Prometheus.

    10. The second you see someone on Facebook get engaged, you instantly scrutinize the proposal, the ring, and any other detail you can find.

    11. And it's a constant struggle to keep your real feelings off of your face when an acquaintance debuts a new, less-than-ideal haircut.

    12. Not to mention when someone you know has a baby and gives it a name that you think is ridiculous.

    13. You don't want to be involved in the drama, but lordy, do you love to watch it unfold.

    14. Deep down, you know it isn’t nice to pass judgment on people, but it just feels so good sometimes.

    15. Not that you’ll ever let anyone know your true feelings — except your closest, most trusted, and equally judgmental friends.

    16. Because the last thing you want is for people to find out all the shit you're thinking about them.

    17. But... every once in a while, a terrifying thought will hit you: “I wonder what people are saying about me?”