Not Really Meant for Those Boobie Sunburns You Get When You Take Your Kids to the Water Park and Forget to Lather Up Your Chest With Sunscreen.
Can of gold spray paint: $6.99
Claw from a sparrow that Kitty dumped at the artist's feet this morning: Priceless.
Creating a necklace and selling it online to people who know how to use sunscreen properly and clearly won't be bothered by getting scratched by a dead bird claw sheathed in gold: $430.00.
For everything else, there's therapy.