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Celebrity New Year's Resolutions For 2015

(Or at least they should be.)

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Matthew McConaughey: hire a translator

Can't the volume go up any more? No? That's just his voice?
Via hollywoodreporter.com

Can't the volume go up any more? No? That's just his voice?

Harry Styles: find a different hat

Seriously, any hat. Even a bucket hat or a fedora would be preferable at this point.
Via s3-ec.buzzfed.com

Seriously, any hat. Even a bucket hat or a fedora would be preferable at this point.

Jay-Z: start taking the stairs

Something went down in that elevator, and it wasn't just the floor.
Via flyheight.com

Something went down in that elevator, and it wasn't just the floor.

Taylor Swift: purchase a GPS

... so she can finally figure out whether she's out of the woods, once and for all.
Via billboard.com

... so she can finally figure out whether she's out of the woods, once and for all.

Kim Kardashian: get, you know, a table to hold her drinks

No ifs, ands, or butts.
Via image-cdn.zap2it.com

No ifs, ands, or butts.

Prince George - learn to share the world's adoration

Sharing toys is hard enough, but sharing the love of millions?
Via images.thehollywoodgossip.com

Sharing toys is hard enough, but sharing the love of millions?

Ariana Grande: avoid wings

Victoria's Secret is that she's got it out for Ariana.
Getty Images Samir Hussein / Via images.thehollywoodgossip.com

Victoria's Secret is that she's got it out for Ariana.

Red Bull: avoid mentioning wings

New slogan idea: "Red Bull gives you no guarantees."
Via cdn.abclocal.go.com

New slogan idea: "Red Bull gives you no guarantees."

Meghan Trainor: buy a subwoofer

All about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble.
Via cos.h-cdn.co

All about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble.

Seth Rogen: ????

Become less dangerous?Smoke less pot?Smoke more pot? Piss off more dictators? This guy's way more complicated than what Pineapple Express prepared me for.
Via www3.pictures.zimbio.com

Become less dangerous?

Smoke less pot?

Smoke more pot?

Piss off more dictators?

This guy's way more complicated than what Pineapple Express prepared me for.

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