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Someone Put Up A Craigslist Ad Looking To Pop Your Zits And Yeah, This Is Probably A Bad Idea

Stranger's zits are just friends you haven't popped yet.

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"I am one of the popaholic [sic] obsessed with watching videos of blackheads/pimples/sebaceous filaments being picked at or popped. I thought I give [sic] myself a holiday present this year and pop some pimples of my own. Only I don't seem to have any. This is where you come in. If you have pimples/acne/blackheads and would allow me to pop them I would be so extremely grateful.
I would pay you too. $45 an hour.
Please send pictures of what you would let me pop and your availability.

Anyway! This is a terrible idea, because 1) stranger danger 2) you shouldn't go to an amateur aesthetician to get your zits dealt with and 3) the first two points above. But still, random anonymous Craigslist stranger, we salute you for trying to chase your pus-filled dreams.

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