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Here's All The Crazy Shit Everyone Wore To 2006 Oscars

Ten years and so much taffeta ago.

1. First of all, there were PENGUINS.

Thanks to March of the Penguins.
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Thanks to March of the Penguins.

2. Amy Adams went deep into brown.

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3. Gary Busey was there.

For some reason.
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For some reason.

4. And model Karolina Kurkova.

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5. Ludacris? Okay, Ludacris!

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6. Jessica Alba wore your abuelita's brocade tablecloth.

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7. Rachel Weisz wore some sandals and bows.

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8. Naomi Watts was there in some tatters.

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9. Helena Bonham-Carter did her thing.*

*Her thing is barely restrained cuckoo crazy.
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*Her thing is barely restrained cuckoo crazy.

10. Jane Seymour serenaded on the world's tiniest guitar.

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11. Remember, the penguins.

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12. Jake Gyllenhaal was just surprised about everything.

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13. As was George Clooney.

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14. DAME Judi Dench is wondering why she's even bothering with all the hoi polloi.

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15. It took Nicole Kidman hours to achieve that pose.

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16. Will Smith went for wide lapels.

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17. Charlize Theron was very tan.

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18. Jennifer Garner did some shimmer.

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19. PENGUINS.

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20. Hilary Swank went for basic black.

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21. Jennifer Lopez stunned in green.

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22. Remember this love?

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23. ~GUINS~.

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24. Salma Hayek just radiated.

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25. Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams were the most gorgeous couple ever.

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26. Jennifer Aniston was feeling her black dress.

The woman behind her? Not so much.
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The woman behind her? Not so much.

27. Keira Knightley werked a doll-like pose.

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28. Uma Thurman was not so sure about this whole red carpet mess.

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29. Reese Witherspoon looked toward the light.

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30. And Sandra Bullock basically won the whole damn thing because her dress had pockets.

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