Recently, I wrote about a young woman who struggled for over two years to get her doctors to listen to her complaints about fatigue instead of focusing on her (very normal) weight; as it turns out, she was suffering from sleep apnea.
The story resonated with a lot of people — primarily, it seems, women, who often have a much harder time getting doctors to take them seriously (and focus on other things besides their weight). This phenomenon should absolutely be talked about, and people should feel empowered to speak up to their doctors. So, here are some of the stories that were shared.
1. "A doctor told me that I needed to lose weight to lower my blood pressure and cholesterol. I’m not overweight, I work out six times a week, and I eat healthy."
2. "I developed hives over about a third of my body. I was waking myself up in the middle of the night because I was scratching myself raw in my sleep. I asked my doctor for a referral to an allergist, and his response was, 'I guess if you think you need one, but really, I'd just try cutting out things like shellfish. I'm more worried about your weight, so you should also stop putting cream in your coffee and use skim milk instead of whole milk.' Excuse me?"
"He knew nothing about my eating habits, so every single one of his suggestions was useless (I don't put any dairy in my tea, I don't like shellfish, and I've never been able to stomach whole milk).
[It] turned out I have a sensitivity to polyester and a new blanket was the root cause. I figured that one out by myself because, shocker, dude never did give me a referral. And no, I did not continue going to him."
3. "My story is definitely not as extreme, but I know the feeling. It was my second to last day at a job, and I rolled my ankle at work one night. No big deal, happens all the time. After about a week and a half, it was not getting better so I went to my primary care doctor. She looked at it, poked a few places, and then immediately told me to do the rest, ice, compress, elevate thing that I had already been doing. She also told me it was just a sprain and that because I'm a larger woman, it would take longer to heal than someone smaller than me."
4. "I went through years of doctors telling me my symptoms were all because of postpartum depression…even when the 'baby' was 3 years old! [They] insisted I would feel better if I just lost weight."
5. "[It] took me three years to get diagnosed with hydrocephalus after telling my very first doctor I think something is going on with my brain." According to Mayo Clinic, hydrocephalus is a buildup of fluid in cavities in the brain.
"Before [I moved] to another state and [got] completely different doctors, [my doctors] were treating me for a GASTROINTESTINAL DISORDER. Yeah, turns out that it’s neurological like I originally thought."
6. "I started to going to doctors, talking about my tiredness, body aches, insomnia, migraines, and weight gain. They told me things like 'calories in, calories out,' 'you need to exercise more,' 'take more Vitamin D,' and 'you’re just getting older.'"
7. "At 27 everything in my body started going haywire, and I would frequently get the brushoff of 'it's all in your head' because physicians couldn’t figure out what was wrong."
8. "I was lucky in that I was diagnosed in my mid-20s, but I did have to go through three unneeded sinus surgeries first and [was] told I had 'severe' athlete's foot when in fact I have psoriasis, psoriatic arthritis, and Sjögren’s syndrome."
"I still have quite a few days where I don’t feel great, but I feel so much better than before when doctors were just making decisions without really listening or looking at what was going on."
9. "I went to a doctor on my college campus because I had a horrible cough. He spent the next 30 minutes asking me questions about my Type 1 Diabetes, even though 1.) That’s not why I was there, 2.) He wasn’t my endocrinologist and 3.) He knew my diabetes care took place at a globally recognized facility."
10. "My primary care doctor blew off my complaints about extreme fatigue. I was bounced from one psychiatrist to another and told I was depressed or bipolar. Years of useless drugs down my throat, plus the added stigma from other doctors [for having] mental disorders in my medical chart."
11. "I once had a GI (gastroenterologist) tell me my chronic stomach issues were because I'm a woman and 'women are always just stressed out all the time.' Like...ALL women, all the time. I have multiple previously-diagnosed GI ailments: celiac disease, gastroparesis, and GERD. (Not [diagnosed] by him, my old GI retired.) I've also had stomach ulcers."
12. "I went to my doctor in my early 20s because my hair was rapidly falling out, and she told me, 'I'm not really concerned with that. You should lose weight, and then we can address any other issues.' I told her I am her patient, and I want to address this problem now. She wrote me a referral for a dermatologist who 'specializes in these sort of superficial cosmetic issues.' She wouldn't even order a blood test."
13. "I went to a new eye doctor to explore why I was seeing spots and had headaches all the time. His answer was 'lose weight,' and I stormed out of there letting him know it was an incredibly insensitive and stupid answer. Turns out I had zero blood cells and had severe aplastic anemia. I could have died."
14. "I don't often comment, but this spoke to me. I had an ectopic pregnancy and was in so much pain. [I] looked like I was six months pregnant, [and one day I] passed out in my bathroom and finally called an ambulance. The paramedics didn't even check me and told me it was just gas. I tried explaining I believed I was pregnant and that it could be ectopic."
"They continued to insist it was a gastrointestinal issue. I obviously wasn't going to go to hospital for gas, so I tried a million things to relieve it. I finally was in so much pain that I went to the emergency room, and of course, it was an ectopic pregnancy, and I was bleeding so badly into my abdomen that they rushed me into emergency surgery right there.
I've always been so fucking pissed about this whole encounter I had with these male paramedics. I literally told them what the issue was, and they still disregarded it."
15. And finally, a nice(-er) story, because we need one: "As a nurse, it sickens me to know people have to go through this. When I was in my early 30s, I got sick with severe generalized symptoms. I thought I was dying. I had been very active and productive and ended having to take leave from work and [was] nearly bedridden. My MD at the time said it was fibromyalgia."
Well, that was all a little heavy. Remember, everyone, the moral of the story is NOT to avoid seeing your doctor; it's to be clear and firm with your doctor, and make sure your needs are met. Stay safe and healthy, everyone!
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.