The Stages Of Going To A Show At The Hollywood Bowl

I went to my first show at the Hollywood Bowl last night. And I wasn't prepared for all the emotions I experienced...

1. Excitement

Because you're finally going to the Hollywood Bowl. And you've heard great things. Such a legendary venue.

2. Stress

Because of the traffic near Hollywood & Highland, and the parking situation. You just don't want to deal with that. Seriously, why?

3. Anxiety

Now you're stuck in traffic. You're afraid you'll miss the show. What if the opening act is any good??

4. Anger

You just realized how far you have to walk from your parking, that parking spot that cost you $30, and won't let you "leave early". Because, you know, it's not a real parking lot.

5. Despair

You finally get to the Bowl (all sweaty, mind you) and the line is out of control. You are a die-hard fan. You bought your tickets on the first day of pre-sale, but you have to wait in this ridiculous line to pick them up. You're never going to make it.

6. You imagined this:

7. But you find this instead:

The "line". Is. Just. Not. Moving.

8. Hope

You finally make it past the turnstile. And you get hopeful. But then you experience something unexpected...

9. Exhaustion

... when you see how much more you still have to trek (hike) to get to your freakin' seats. You wonder why they're doing this to you, and if whoever designed the Bowl is laughing at you right now.

10. Infuriation

When you realize your seat has obstructed view, and on top of that, the fatso next to you doesn't realize that he is invading your space, like literally, your seat- he is taking 2 seats, he is almost on top of you and doesn't even acknowledge it. He didn't share his artisan sea salt chips either.

11. Contentment

You forget everything. And you're happy. Because, after all, this IS a magical venue, and no matter what, the show will be amazing. You just know it. You have a good feeling about this. So you want a beer to celebrate.

12. Misery

Just when you thought you had it all covered, misery hits you in the face when you realize the line to get booze is also out of control. But, hey! It's a gorgeous night out, and you get to see the stars in the clear sky. That doesn't happen every day.

13. Outrage

Beer in hand, you discover that hidden VIP entrance in the back, with no line. NO. LINE. Why am I not a VIP, you wonder?

14. Sadness

Now you're just sad.

15. Ecstasy

But it is such a magical venue. And the band is killing it! They're amazing... This is totally worth it. You're more than excited at this point.

16. Then you remember that you have to walk ALLLLLL the way back to your car

So you promise yourself you'll never go back to the Bowl. Ever again.

17. Unless you're helicoptered in.

And out.