21 Gross Bathroom Stories That Made Me Clutch My Pearls

    The office loos are a lawless land sometimes.

    We asked the BuzzFeed Community to tell us about the grossest things they've found in their work bathrooms, and they came up trumps. Here are some of the stories:

    1. The Load of Crap

    2. The Condom Conundrum

    "Last week at work, the cleaner (who took a picture to prove it) found a condom full of urine tied up like some freaking water balloon and placed in the bin visible for all to see in the men's bathroom!! WTAF is wrong with people!"

    j4f1acbad0

    3. The Bad Hair Day

    4. The Abstract Artist

    "Years ago at my job, there was a mysterious female that would paint some of the bathroom stalls with her faeces and sometimes her menstrual blood. I went to report it to HR and they had already received several complaints. Apparently, she had been doing this on different floors. She ended up leaving the job, and no one would ever tell me who it was."

    EmpressLockness

    5. The Menstrual Message

    6. The Poop Pathway

    "There was shit on the floor outside the door to the toilets. Inside the toilets, there was a trail of shit from a cubicle to a sink to a hair dryer, and then out the door."

    isabelb2

    7. The Shower Sitch

    "There is a mystery shitter in my office. Twice in the past six months, an actual human turd has been found on the floor of the women's toilets. Not only that, but in a meeting with our building manager, he reported that the SHOWERS in the basement of our building are getting clogged with human faeces."

    rart4652

    8. The Satisfying Squish

    9. The Phantom Pooper

    "We had a phantom pooper who would dump a load and just leave it. There was no toilet roll left in the bowl, so we knew they didn't wipe."

    Janner

    10. The Poo Stew

    11. The New Office Gesture

    "Our big corporate travel management company moved into a brand-new office built just for us. One day early on, we walked into the women's bathroom on our floor to see a used pad stuck on the far wall. Grown women, for crying out loud. I still can't fathom what would have possessed someone to do that."

    k4c2ed0631

    12. The Snot Rockets

    13. The Toilet Snack

    "Once saw a pizza crust and open container of garlic butter on the back of the toilet like someone was eating and using the bathroom. Gross!"

    hollynicolet2

    14. The Pube Purge

    "Two or three times I have seen trimmed pubes on the floor. I mean, who does that??"

    kiribaberuk

    15. The Territory Marker

    16. Jill's Explosion

    "For a couple of years I worked in this small cute café, which was pretty quiet and didn't get that many customers but had a lot of regulars. One day, one of our customers, let's call her Jill, comes up and tells me she's had an accident in the loo. I think to myself, No problem, probably just loo roll blocking the toilet or something. So she wanders off and I get the plunger from the cupboard and go into the toilet. Lo and behold, there is not only shit smeared everywhere, but also blood. It was quite literally a shitstorm. It was all over the walls, the toilet; blood had been smeared across the mirror, and the toilet was blocked with the fattest shit I've ever seen. I walked out of the bathroom slowly, saw Jill sitting at the table, and all she did was smile and wave at me."

    1998rleigh

    17. The Office Pet

    "A WORM. A WORM IN THE TOILET BOWL. It was long and red, so i thought it was period blood, but then i saw it moving around clearly ALIVE, so i jetted out of that stall real quick. I looked it up later and it was likely a tubificid, and they typically live in colonies in sewage systems. No wonder the plumbing is so bad at my building."

    ravenouslittlehoneybadger

    18. The Pink-Eye Epidemic

    19. The Lasagne Lover

    "An entire lasagna."

    rachele47ba33f84

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    Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.