Before we go throwing stones, let's first be honest about ourselves: I fart. You fart. WE. ALL. FART.
But according to a new book, appropriately titled Does It Fart?, we aren't the only ones in the animal kingdom that ~break wind~.
So, without further ado, here are 15 animals you might be surprised to know also rip ass. 🙊💨
1.Not only do American cockroaches fart, but if you've ever seen one in your pantry, it probably farted ON YOUR FOOD. Gives a whole new meaning to "cut the cheese," you know?
2.Giraffes may look like elegant creatures, but their farts smell really bad. Lucky for them, their noses are so far away from their butts that they probably can't smell a thing.
3.Kangaroos also fart, but unfortunately not as a propulsion mechanism to jump, which would be amazing.
4.Zebra farts are so loud that you can literally hear them "from long distances across the plains of Africa" — the perfect soundtrack to a safari vacation!
5.TBH, I've always mistrusted goats, but now I feel totally justified: A plane full of them once had to land because they farted so much the fire alarm went off. 💨🚨
6.Not only do sea lions have the smelliest farts out of all million+ animal species, but their farts also — *holds nose* — smell like rotten fish.
7.And whales' farts, while not the smelliest, are actually the biggest farts of them all.
8.I'm happy to report that although llamas fart, their farts don't smell too bad — that is, according to people who've smelled them.
9.Python farts are "thick and meaty," words that sound fine when describing a steak, but not when describing snake fecal fumes.
10.Ferrets occasionally startle themselves when they fart (or maybe they're just looking around for someone else to blame).
11.Millipedes also fart, but given that the size of their farts is proportional to the size of their bodies, you'll probably never have to worry about smelling them.
12.Between their beard and their butts, bearded dragons are repulsive at both ends.
13.Given that honey badgers look like skunks, it's not totally surprising that they fart. What is surprising is that their farts are so strong they use them to overwhelm bees when ravaging their nests for honey.
14.Iguanas fart too, and because knowledge is power, I should also tell you that the more fiber they eat, the "wetter" their farts sound. 🙃
15.And finally, because nothing is sacred, dolphins' farts are silent but deadly, reeking of their fishy diet. 😭