1. Even though you might love cheese...
2. And you're all about chocolate...
3. You are absolutely passionately against milk in all its liquid forms.
4. Do not be fooled by this cute animation, milk is a terrible terrible thing.
5. FACT: Milk is the preferred drink of notorious murderers like this one.
6. To drink milk from the source you would literally have to SUCKLE A COW.
7. And let's talk about the milk moustache, which everyone has been trying to make sexy for about 15 years.
Here are three of the most beautiful people in the world, even THEY look ridiculous with a milk moustache.
8. Then there's what happens if the person drinking milk ACTUALLY has a moustache.
9. Milk propagandists are getting out of control.
10. People keep arguing about whether tea goes in before or after you put the milk in the cup.
11. When obviously the correct answer to the question of milk in tea is...
12. Milk in the fridge is actually an evil ticking timebomb.
16. THEN there's the apparent inability of everyone in the world to drink milk without getting it everywhere.
Why? Why only milk? This literally never happens with any other drink.