Dear Rapist,
I have many things I'd like to say to you. Most of them are very mean, but I will do my best to refrain from spreading more hate, because we all know spreading hate is not fruitful.
I think what you have done is absolutely despicable. I am extremely curious to know: what on God's green Earth would have possessed you to do such a thing? To violate someone, to take away who they once were, to take away their sense of security, to completely change the way their brain is wired? Did it make you feel powerful? Was it because you were sexually frustrated and needed a release? Was it because you thought your victim was being coy and deep down really wanted it? Or are you just struggling with something that you're completely unaware of?
Not only have you destroyed a human being, but you've also impacted every relationship your victim will ever have, whether it be romantic, sexual, or friendly. Your victim will inevitably have nightmares with your face. Your victim will feel anxious walking to their car at night. Your victim will shudder when someone tries to give them a hug. Your victim will cry countless tears, and maybe even feel as though their life isn't worth living.
What you may not know is that, based on your actions, society will inflict further emotional and psychological damage on your victim. Society will call the victim a slut, simply because they had several other sexual partners in the past. Society will ask them what they were wearing, as if that somehow would have made it okay for you to take advantage of them if they were scantily clad. Society will criticize the victim for not filing a report with the police, for not getting a rape kit done, when we all know the police rarely take legal actions due to insufficient amounts of evidence. The legal system will simply cite the victim's testimony as a lost cause. Society will accuse the victim of lying, over and over again. No matter how much evidence there is, the victim will be pegged as a liar who was looking for money, was looking to get revenge, or simply made a mistake that they now regret and are trying to cover up.
And what will society say about you? "It can't be true. He's not the kind of person that would do such a thing." As if all rapists fit a certain profile.
People will talk about how much you have to lose. "A rape charge could end his very bright future." As if your victim was a piece of trash without a future whatsoever.
The psychological damage that you have caused will inhibit your victim from being the same person they were before, the person who had their whole life ahead of them. But do you know what? Your victim will overcome this. Because your victim is much stronger than you will ever be. Your victim will not always be a victim. Your victim will be labeled a survivor, a hero, someone who encouraged victims around the world, the voice that evoked change in a messed up world.
But you? You will always be a rapist. The public may not define you by this, but at the end of the day, it is what you are, and always will be. A rapist. Someone who has ruined lives. Legally, you might have gotten away with it. You might never spend a day in prison. But in your soul, if you have one, you will always know what you did, and it will eat away at you until you can no longer keep it at bay. I truly hope that someday you find genuine remorse, but seeing as you clearly have no value for human life or honesty, I highly doubt remorse is something you can accomplish on your own.
I am saying these things to you because it's time for you and your kind to start attempting to understand the impact you have on victims. It is also time for me to try and understand what so possesses your kind to act the way they do; like animals, following very primal instincts. It would be hypocritical for me to simply spit words of hate. I believe that you are not an inherently bad person. I believe that with some psychological help, you could feel true remorse for the life you destroyed. It's time for rapists like you to feel human emotions again. I am on the side of the victim, and I always will be. You should be, too.
Sincerely,
Jake Muzzarelli
If you are a victim and need help, or someone to talk to:
Call 1-800-656-4673 to talk with someone or visit https://centers.rainn.org to find a rape crisis center near you.
Or visit https://www.notalone.gov for countless other resources
If you would like to support victims, take the time to take the It's On Us Pledge and vow to end sexual assaults:
http://itsonus.org
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