Thoughts All Women Who Can't Cook Have While Grocery Shopping

I'm just gonna buy a whole bunch of random shit to look like I know what I'm doing.

When you walk through the doors feeling confident...

Gon' slay this b*tch

When you head to the produce aisle...

Wait, is a tomato a fruit or a vegetable? Is this round thing a cantaloupe or a honeydew? Do I like honeydew???

And you end up buying one of those prepackaged fruit bowls instead.

It's the same thing anyway

When you buy those weird-shaped pasta and you feel fancy AF...

I'm def gonna cook this. I'll turn my kitchen into my very own little Italy.

When you are deciding what kind of meat to buy...

I guess, I'll get the chicken? "Free range" because that means.... something good.

When you kind of start to wander about the supermarket feeling lost...

How can shopping for food be this hard??

When you start to get shopping cart envy...

I need to get my sh*t together

When you start to feel suspicious that other people are judging your shopping cart...

I just know that old lady over there is talking about me...

When you try to play it cool when the workers ask if you need help...

I'm good, k.

When you finally give up and just fill your cart up with junk food and microwaveable meals...

Just don't.

When you get to the freezers and bypass all the milk, cheese, healthy yogurts and whatchamacallits and get yourself some ice-cream...

You've had a long day. What? You've been here only five minutes???

When you head to the a-a-a-a-a-lcohol... :)

I feel my spirits(lol) picking back up already

When you head to the check out aisle and are just happy the whole thing is almost over...

Honestly, this is probably why I'm not married. Men like women who can cook right???

But then you finally walk out that hell hole and realize: You make your own money and can just buy takeout or go to a restaurant. It's 20 f*cking 16. You will NOT be caught up in other people's antiquated gender roles.You still slay!!