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12 Famously-Mustachioed Men Who Are Judging Your Fake 'Stache

Try harder.

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1. President Theodore Roosevelt

"I moustache you a question: why do you disrespect me like that? After all I did for national parks?"
Via media.npr.org

"I moustache you a question: why do you disrespect me like that? After all I did for national parks?"

2. Legendary Wrestler (And Reality Star) Hulk Hogan

"HOGAN KNOWS BEST. Specifically, I know that your moustache is an efface to everything I stand for."
Via girlswithfakemustachesonokcupid.tumblr.com

"HOGAN KNOWS BEST. Specifically, I know that your moustache is an efface to everything I stand for."

3. Archduke Franz Ferdinand

"My moustache was worth starting a war over. Yours isn't."
Via girlswithfakemustachesonokcupid.tumblr.com

"My moustache was worth starting a war over. Yours isn't."

4. Walter Cronkite

"And that's the way it is, so get the f**ck out my face."
Via modernprimate.com

"And that's the way it is, so get the f**ck out my face."

5. Former Major League Pitcher Rollie Fingers

"This moustache took four years, seven tons of wax and thousands of hours of labor-intensive curling. Yours too, right?"
Via realclearsports.com

"This moustache took four years, seven tons of wax and thousands of hours of labor-intensive curling. Yours too, right?"

6. Albert Einstein

"E = MC2, but a stupid stick and black, curly plastic ≠ legendary moustache."
Via spirithalloween.com

"E = MC2, but a stupid stick and black, curly plastic ≠ legendary moustache."

7. Ron Swanson

"I hate you. Get out of my forest."
Via fastcocreate.com

"I hate you. Get out of my forest."

8. Wyatt Earp

"I turn away from you and your pathetic moustache/sunglasses combination."
Via girlswithfakemustachesonokcupid.tumblr.com

"I turn away from you and your pathetic moustache/sunglasses combination."

9. Former New York Gubernatorial Candidate Jimmy McMillan

"Hey, look what you can do with your hair. I'm really impressed. I just don't have your sense of imagination, hair-follicularly."
Via blog.flatscore.com

"Hey, look what you can do with your hair. I'm really impressed. I just don't have your sense of imagination, hair-follicularly."

10. Groucho Marx

"You're terrifying."
Via cdn.pastemagazine.com

"You're terrifying."

11. Pancho Villa

"Oh-em-gee, twinsies! LEAVE IMMEDIATELY."
Via s12.postimg.org

"Oh-em-gee, twinsies! LEAVE IMMEDIATELY."

12. President William Howard Taft

"Oh, that's a moustache, right? It looks a bit like somebody painted a moustache on a coffee cup but I know you wouldn't try to shit that front of the only person to ever be both president and Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court."
Via images.businessweek.com

"Oh, that's a moustache, right? It looks a bit like somebody painted a moustache on a coffee cup but I know you wouldn't try to shit that front of the only person to ever be both president and Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court."

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