76 Thoughts Every Girl Has During A Night Out

As girls, we over-think and over-analyze everything. Add in some alcohol and we do it even more.

8:00 PM: What should I wear? I need to look slutty enough to score free drinks, but not too slutty - that I'm mistaken for a real hooker.

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8:05 PM: Damn it, I look fat in everything.

8:06 PM: I need a shot.

8:07 PM: Actually, I should pregame more. I can't go to the club sober.

8:25 PM: Shit, I need to finish getting ready.

9:25 PM: Damn, I look good. I wouldn't kick myself out of bed.

9:26 PM: Remember, I am not going home with anyone tonight.

10:00 PM: I'll hit the bathroom first, get a drink and a shot (obvi), then hit the dance floor.

10:05 PM: Her outfit is so cute.

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10:06 PM: How did she get her hair to look that perfect?

10:07 PM: She's trying too hard. What a slut.

10:09 PM: I have never peed this long in my life.

10:10 PM: Am I drunk already?

10:11 PM: Noooo, not possible - I only pregamed.

10:13 PM: Will I forget my credit card if I open a tab?

10:15 PM: Hmmm, I'll set a reminder in my phone so I don't forget it.

10:16 PM: Ooo, I should update my Facebook and Twitter 'Out partying with my girls. Here's to the nights I won't remember with the friends I'll never forget.'

10:18 PM: Is he looking at me? Is he cute?

10:20 PM: I wonder if that's his girlfriend.

10:25 PM: Should I go talk to him?

10:26 PM: I'll just wait and see if he talks to me.

10:31 PM: He seems interested in me and it seems like they're just friends. We'd be perfect together.

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10:46 PM: Oh, wait - they're making out. What a waste of time.

10:49 PM: I am going to be single forever.

10:51 PM: Wow, would you look at that hunk of meat. Dibs.

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10:55 PM: If I dance, he'll definitely notice me.

10:59 PM: Damn, where did he go?

11:00 PM: I'm sweating - It's so hot in here.

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11:01 PM: My heels are f-cking killing me.

11:03 PM: Where are my friends?

11:09 PM: Why hasn't a guy bought me a drink yet?

11:10 PM: Is my eye makeup smudged?

11:11 PM: Am I drunk?

11:12 PM: Maybe, I should slow down.

11:14 PM: Oh, there's my friends and they're getting shots. Sweet!

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11:25 PM: How many shots have I taken?

11:26 PM: Should I have gotten shots for them too?

11:28 PM: Maybe, I should switch to beer.

11:29 PM: How much money have I spent?

11:38 PM: I need to remember that conversation tomorrow.

11:42 PM: I should ask these people to take a picture of us?

11:44 PM: Wow, I look really good. Stacy not so much.

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11:55 PM: Shit, I think I lost my phone.

11:57 PM: Never mind. It's right here.

11:58 PM: 64 likes on Instagram, I knew that was a good pic.

12:13 AM: Can’t she tell I really don’t care about this story?

12:19 AM: I wonder if I'm blacked out right now.

12:25 AM: Is he flirting with me?

12:29 AM: My ex likes my status - should I text him?

12:34 AM: Shit, how did I use so much battery life already?

12:38 AM: No - I should not text him.

12:39 AM: Forget these heels. I'm just going to leave them under this table.

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12:40 AM: I have to pee...Should I just hold it or wait in line for the bathroom?

12:42 AM: This girl is my new best friend. She is SO nice.

12:44 AM: Do I have to tip this bathroom attendant?

12:46 AM: Well, now I do. She washed my hands for me.

12:59 AM: I should probably drink water.

1:10 AM: Well, I can't say no to a drink offer and it's about damn time.

1:15 AM: I don't ever want this night to end.

1:20 AM: I'm really not that drunk - I don't think.

1:25 AM: Way to buy me a drink and disappear...

1:29 AM: I'm just going to text my ex just to make sure he didn't mean anything by liking my Facebook Status.

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1:39 AM: Oh great, he didn't even respond. I look so stupid.

1:41 AM: (crying) I still love him.

1:44 AM: I'm f-cking starvingggggg.

1:45 AM: All I want in this life, is some pizza and some more pizza.

1:47 AM: I WANT PIZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

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1:59 AM: This pizza is so amazing.

2:10 AM: I am so happy to be home. I just want to lay down and pass out.

2:11 AM: F-ck, I left my debit card at the bar.

2:12 AM: and these are not my shoes.

2:14 AM: I'm definitely going to be so hungover tomorrow.

2:25 AM: OMG, yes! He texted me back.

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