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Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50

Thor's hammer, a lion's mane for your cat, and two-pounds of Starbursts: how far can *you* get without buying something?

Welcome to another edition of “Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50”!

I am your host, Jeff. The game is simple. Try to make it through this entire post without buying something. The list may seem like it’s random, but it’s not.

Don’t plan to buy anything? That’s OK! Stay and enjoy my groan-worthy jokes!

DANGER PUNS AHEAD!

GOOD LUCK, ALL! 😀

1. This flexible tablet stand ($45) so you don't have to hold a damn thing on your day off.

This is too lazy, I simply won't stand for it.

Get it here.

2. This fancy fabric dye ($25) you can use to take any image and print it permanently on fabric using sunlight.

You'll be dye-ing to use it!

Get it here.

3. This yoga strap ($35) that will make your meditation positions effortless.

If you're still reading these captions, I'm glad you have a flexible sense of humor.

Get it here.

4. This Thor hammer night light ($30) for the aspiring hero.

On Thorsdays we get hammered.

Get it here.

5. This stylus/brush combo ($32) for artists looking to go digital.

This stylus might be just write for you.

Get it here.

6. This lion mane ($15) for the cat (or dog) who dreams big.

What you do with it is Narnia business.

Get it here.

7. This black Hawaiian sea salt ($10) that will add a smokey flavor to any dish.

8. This glass carafe ($27) that has a drip-free lid that opens automatically when you pour.

It won't do a pour job.

Get it here.

9. This pajama tank ($9 to $19) for the night owl.

10. This burger press / freezer container ($25) that makes everything hexagonal.

Quite impressed.

Get it here.

11. This block game ($22) that's kinda like reverse Jenga and will for sure turn into a drinking game.

12. This airtight container ($22 to $27) that extends the freshness of your coffee.

It's really quite jarring.

Get it here.

13. These fluffy house slippers ($15) that also sorta clean your floors.

14. This bottle launcher ($36) that turns 2-liter bottles into water rockets.

I hear it's quite a blast.

Get it here.

15. This lotus flower container ($9) that will hold your cotton swab sized items.

Now lotus not be too picky.

Get it here.

16. This hot dog toaster ($18) will cook your buns at the same time.

Certainly not the wurst idea.

Get it here.

17. This bionic wrench ($19) that instantly adjusts to the bolt size you need.

Try not to loose it.

Get it here.

18. This motion sensing LED light ($19) for your dark closet, trunk, or hallway.

Try to make light of a dark situation.

Get it here.

19. And this two pound bag of watermelon Starbursts ($25) just because.

Congrats! You have made it to the end. How do you feel? Craving more jokes? Check out last week’s post here.

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