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Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?

Vitamin-shaped highlighters, a water hammock, and a sound grenade: How far can *you* get without buying something?

Jenny Chang / Jeff Barron / BuzzFeed

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Welcome to another edition of “Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?”

I am your host, Jeff. The game is simple. Try to make it through this entire post without buying something. The list may seem like it’s random, but it’s not.

Don’t plan to buy anything? That’s OK! Stay and enjoy my groanworthy jokes! I italicize each pun for maximum cringe.

Come up with a better pun? Post in the comments! I DO READ ALL THE COMMENTS!


1. This storage container ($50) that has an integrated measuring cap.

For desperate measures.

Comes in a pack of four.

Get it here.

2. This bamboo drawer organizer ($18) that can expand to fit more stuff.

Expanding drawers? How bamboo-zling.

Get it here.

3. These highlighter pens ($7) that look like adorable vitamin capsules.


Get it here.

4. This Japanese exfoliator ($30) that will get rid of all that dead skin.

All other cleansers do a pore job.

Get it here.

5. These silicone molds ($10) to make perfect sunny-side-up eggs.

These will help you egg-ercise making egg-stremely egg-stravagant eggs.

Egg puns, yo.

Get it here.

6. This Sailor Moon backpack ($26) to help you fight against the Dark Kingdom.

It would also make a good constellation prize.

Get it here.

7. This folding water hammock ($28) so you can cool off just below the surface.

Relax and break that surface tension!

Get it here.

8. This minimalist dot grid journal ($10) with thick pages so pen ink won't bleed through., Kristine / Via

So you can draw your own conclusions and pen-t up feelings.

Get it here.

9. This adjustable tablespoon ($8) that will replace your chaotic ring of spoons.

If a soldier is caught with this, will he be quart-martialed?

Get it here.

10. This cable spool ($10) that has magnets in the middle to grasp your earbuds.

Wire we even reading this post?

Get it here.

11. This flexible bag ($11) that transforms into a ball.

If you used the ball as a pillow, it would be a nap-sack.

Get it here.

12. These earmuffs ($25) that will help you shut out the noisy world.

Have you heard about these? No? Good.

Get it here.

13. These Japanese charcoal bar soaps ($9) that will help you exfoliate without drying out your skin.

My taste in humor is quite pore.

Get it here.

14. This patent print of the Argus C camera ($12 to $40) to class up your living space.

Make it the focus of your room!

Get it here.

15. This stainless steel ring ($12) that has rotating balls built into it.

Finally a ring that's not bo-ring!

Get it here.

16. This sound grenade ($20) that will emit a 130-decibel alarm when the pin is pulled.

So you can get home safe and sound.

Get it here.

17. This reconfigurable Tetris lamp ($32) that will fit into any home.

This isn't the first time I've put in a Tetris-related item. I should really write a column on it.

Get it here.

Anxious that you've reached the end and haven't had enough puns? Find last week's edition here.

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