Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?

A shower step, laser scissors, and some terrible advice: How far can *you* get without buying something?

Jenny Chang / Jeff Barron / BuzzFeed

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Welcome to another edition of “Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?”

I am your host, Jeff. The game is simple. Try to make it through this entire post without buying something. The list may seem like it’s random, but it’s not.
Don’t plan to buy anything? That’s OK! Stay and enjoy my groanworthy jokes! I italicize each pun for maximum cringe.

Come up with a better pun? Post in the comments! I DO READ ALL THE COMMENTS!

DANGER! PUNS AHEAD! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! GOOD LUCK, ALL!

1. This collar and tie to make any pet look important.

martin / Via amzn.to, Scanfi / Via amzn.to

“It’s been a ruff week, but this quarter’s earnings are going to be through the woof.”

Price: $4

2. This bedside caddy to hold all your books and snacks.

There’s a few of these out there, but this one seems bedder.

Price: $20

3. These bento lunch boxes that have configurable compartments.

I usually don’t bento-ver backwards on meal prep, but now I might.

Price: $18

4. This desk lamp that’s made of wood and iron.

Bring it along to shed some light on those shady deals.

Price: $37

5. These very fine-point pens that will let you fill in all those small details.

amzn.to, Emilee / Via amzn.to

They come in a 30 pack. I figured that would be a fine point to make.

Price: $16

6. These ceramic eggs for your mini succulents.

Not too egg-stravagant.

Price: $16

7. This quick-drying silicone mat that can fold up to save space.

It’s co-mat-ible with all dishes.

Price: $10

8. This shower step that makes it easier to get the right angle for shaving.

Using it is a one-step process.

Price: $20

9. This weird container that bends around your odd-shaped sandwiches.

It’ll be jam packed!

Price: $15

10. This knork (a knife and fork combination).

What the fork will they think of next?

Price: $12

11. This illustrated book of just awful advice.

The humor seems kinda edgy.

Price: $9

12. This rocket engine pour-over brewer because it’s the fuel we all need.

Great for the launch-time rush.

Price: $11

13. These laser-guided scissors that will never mislead you.

These are some cutting-edge scissors, man.

Price: $9

14. This rainbow keyboard cover that’s bright as hell!

There’s no esc from the colors!

Price: $7

15. This waxed canvas lunch tote that’s kinda ridiculous, but also kinda cool.

Everyone will know that it’s tote-ally yours.
Ooof, that one hurt to write.

Price: $45

16. This squirrel feeder that will probably make them self-conscious.

I can’t come up with acorn-y pun for this one. Help?

Price: $12

17. This water bottle with a storage compartment to keep your cards and keys in.

Container?! I hardly know her!

Price: $13

Aaaand that’s about it for this week. Maybe looking for more? There’s always last week’s edition.

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