19 Truths About Going To Raves No One Warns You About
"Damn, I'm loving this $13 beer," said no one ever.
Before you even step inside the venue, you'll be forced to make some awfully tough decisions.
And when nature calls, you'll be greeted by ghastly bodily fluids, limited TP, and pitch-black darkness.
You will make questionable financial decisions along the way.
You might witness the emotional complexity of rave couples in their natural habitat.
Rave moms are a pure gift to the world that must be protected at all costs.
No matter how hard you try to stay together, someone's gonna pull a Scooby Doo.
And when you get lost at a rave, it will feel like the adult version of losing your mom at the supermarket.
FYI there's a reason totems exist other than for our pure entertainment.
Walking through a crowd means no personal space and being bathed in the sweat of a thousand ravers.
And someone will generously offer you a variation of these three items at every corner.
And if you're not prepared, you'll be in for a world of hurt.
The moment the music stops, you and 20,000 others will be tasked with finding the ONE exit.
After it's over, you'll look back on the incredible experience and try to laugh through the pain.
And thanks to one too many overpriced beers, your finances will be in shambles.
But even financial ruin and depleted brain cells won't stop you from immediately planning your next event.
Because let's face it: If the lineup is lit, you will say "fuck it" to financial woes and self-control.
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