Being a parent is not easy, and yet, it feels like we often expect parents to have all the answers and always keep it together.
Yes, there are a lot of beautiful and amazing aspects to parenting, but whether or not people want to admit it, there are things about parenthood that just plain SUCK ASS.
Instead of pretending like raising children is all sunshine and rainbows, I thought it was time we get brutally honest about some of the realities of child-rearing. So I asked the BuzzFeed Community to share the things they actually HATE about parenting, and the answers were honestly super refreshing.
1. "I genuinely love being a mother, but I fucking hate going to the park. Any park or playground can burn to the ground."
2. "I don't like reading little kid's books. It's soooooo boring! Especially when they want the same story five or more times in a row! Haha."
— Anonymous
3. "The lack of privacy and the expectation that you’re OK with it. Want to pee? BOOM! There’s a toddler flinging the door open asking for a cuddle. Want to have a shower? BOOM! There’s someone busting into the room asking you to open their yogurt."
4. "How lonely it can be once they hit their mid-teen and late-teen years. You were the literal sun of their universe, and then one day, not so much — and oftentimes, not at all. It's natural and is what is supposed to happen, but goddamn it, I miss being the sun."
5. "I hate extracurricular activities. Sure, let's add more chaos to the schedule that requires time and money we don't have, and sit with parents who go wild at tee-ball games as if the college recruiter is there offering scholarships."
6. "I hate that I don't know who I am anymore. Even when I have time to pursue old hobbies, I don't know if THAT'S how I want to spend my time. I don't have a job. I feel like I'm not adding value to the world."
—Anonymous
7. "I hate the fear that came with having children. I was so carefree before, but now I worry about everything under the sun!"
8. "All the food making — breakfast, lunch, dinner. It’s exhausting! Especially if you don’t like cooking. Then you get in a groove with it and all of a sudden they hate what you’re making."
9. "It NEVER ENDS. You are never NOT a parent and your kid will always need something from you, whether physically, mentally, financially, or emotionally. Mine's an adult and they are still so needy sometimes it makes me want to just move and not tell anyone where I went."
10. "When you have very young kids (0–4), it's so hard that you can't just go watch TV, play a video game, go clothes shopping, or even just lie down and stare into space for ten minutes. They need you ALL THE TIME. I like to be very present as a parent, but the burnout is REAL."
11. "I hated playing with my kids. I loved doing stuff with them, but actually playing is torture. Now that they’re all older, it’s easier because the pretend-play era is over. Thank god."
12. "I was an early childhood educator before I had my kid, and everyone said I would be such a great mom. I thought so too, but it's impossible. I'm a stay-at-home parent, and I've never been more exhausted or depressed. I just want to run away to live in the desert selling cactus-themed keychains. Even when I get enough sleep, I'm tired. I don't know what the hell to feed my toddler. Am I setting too many boundaries or not enough? The internet says both! Should they be on a nap schedule or have them bend to my life? Do I parent like the French, do I parent like the Spanish, or do I helicopter like Americans tend to do? Every single choice I make I question."
13. "The pressure to always look like you’re being a good parent in public. There are so many rules for parenting now and it’s nearly impossible to follow all of them all the time. I’m doing the best I can, shouldn’t that be enough?"
14. "I hate the constant feeling of being 'on call.' My kids will be playing quietly, so I try to take that moment to do something productive, only to be interrupted with a kid on the toilet screaming to be wiped, or a kid needs a snack, or siblings fighting, or just one following you to other room asking what you’re doing."
15. "I HATED being the bad guy. I always had to be the one who set the punishment, and had to dole it out. I love the relationship my daughter and I have now that she's grown. So much better."
16. "The judgment from other parents is the worst for me. It doesn't matter what you do, there is going to be another parent shaming you for it."
17. "I love my toddler son more than anything, but he's autistic and non-verbal. And on really terrible days when he has meltdowns, I regret becoming a parent and wish I could run away."
18. "Bedtime. By the time I’m ready to wind down and settle in for the night, I have to try and get my toddler into his pajamas, brush his teeth, calmed down enough to sleep, wrestle him into bed, and maybe a million other things because he’s a master of procrastination. All I want to do is get ready for bed myself and read!"
19. "My body changed and now I have a 'shelf' where my loose skin hangs due to two c-sections. One side is normal-ish and even, but the other side has the loose skin that hangs over that shelf. I absolutely hate it and will never have enough money to get it fixed."
20. "You are made to feel guilty if you want to spend a weekend (or more) without your kids. Sometimes I just want to feel like myself again and not be a mom, or a boss, or a short-order cook, or a maid, or a referee. I just want to feel like the person I was before all the responsibility, just for a day or even a few hours. It's OK to need a break whenever you feel the need!"
21. "I had my twins at 42. Long road to parenthood — didn't wait that long on purpose but that's how we ended up. I am at least 10 years older than all the other moms in my kids' grade."
22. "The constant, pointless bathroom trips. When my daughter was a toddler and potty training, she was fascinated with bathrooms and wanted to go to EVERY bathroom she saw."
"Most of the time she wouldn't have to go, but as we were training, we had to give the benefit of the doubt. Once on a plane, she made me take her twice over a two-hour flight. Those are already casket-sized rooms, so imagine sharing it with a climbing toddler. Port-a-potties were her favorite. *grimace*"
—Anonymous
23. "I hate being a parent, and if I knew then what I know now, I’d be blissfully child-free."
