From Not So Humble Beginnings...
So I'll start off by saying that what I am going to say to you is very personal for me, something which I never really discuss as I am one of the small group of adults who do (and always have) struggled with spots and sores. I am currently 26 years of age, but my story begins at the age of 13...
For many this is a common age to get a few spots here and there, because puberty happens. It was during this time where I turned to family for help and advice... this was the point where I should have been shown the right thing to do.
Instead of being told to keep my skin clean, to wash my face everyday with soap or face wash and to NOT pick I was told to pick my spots and peer pressured into wearing makeup (like many teenage girls).
Bullying And Avoidance...
Discovering makeup was bad, not only did it look awful (they didn't make makeup for pale souls back then) but it clogged up my pores no end. I came from a family where money was tight, so I wasn't allowed to have makeup wipes as they were a "luxury". Instead I was told to use my flannel and soap.
I found that this didn't work overly too well and didn't get enough of the makeup off, so my pores were always clogged. This created more spots, so I ended up using more and more makeup to try and cover it up. In doing so many of the picked spots became infected, but I kept having to apply makeup to cover it up.
I started to get bullied a lot for the way I looked, the picking became so bad that I even took nail clippers to my own forehead (I still have the scar to prove it). I wore a headband to try and cover the sores on my forehead, soon the school told me I was not allowed to wear it and I had many days off school to avoid the bullies.
School sucked, but it got better during college as they went down slightly and I was able to clean my face more with makeup wipes. I had also started experimenting with spot remedies...
The 'Miracle' Cures....
Nearing the end of school and the start of college there was a huge surge in products claiming to help or even get rid of spots, naturally I ended up trying quite a few of them!
To start I tried a mixture of face washes, combined with a specific solution for problem areas. I have sensitive skin, so I found that many of the face washes were just too abrasive on my skin. I tried at least 10, from Neutrogena to Clean & Clear.
I did find a couple of the specific solutions more helpful, mostly those that contained tea tree, but I still couldn't control my urge to pick and cover up with makeup. This was a point where I realised that the problem was me.
Dealing With The Emotions...
When I realised that I was mostly the problem, I decided to make an oath not to pick a single spot again.... an oath I still keep breaking even today. I have personally found it very hard, mostly because I've never known any better.
I've had some seriously rough times, times where I have locked myself away and picked even more because of the stress... it's a cycle that is tough to break. My first glimmer of hope came from my first proper boyfriend.
At this point I was about 18 years of age and only 2 people had ever seen me without makeup on... my mother and my twin sister, who I lived with at the time. My then boyfriend decided one night he would spring himself on me, a night I had no makeup on.
I was mortified and told my mother not to let him in, I told him to just go home and I didn't want to see him. He and my mother ignored me, so I barricaded myself into my room... after a while, when I realised he wouldn't leave, I decided to throw the door open and show him the real me.
I remember shouting "are you happy now?" into his face, crying... he reacted in a way I didn't understand and couldn't comprehend... he told me I was beautiful no matter what, and kissed me on my red and sore forehead. It was then I knew I wasn't as alien as I thought I was.
Acceptance And Hope...
It was bizarre to have someone other than my mother or sister see my bare face, but once my emotions calmed down I felt oddly liberated. I felt like perhaps I could be myself more and accept myself for who I was.
Attached to that acceptance was hope... I hoped that by showing more people my face the more relaxed I would become and perhaps the more open I would be to leaving my makeup off for longer than an hour.
The older I have become the more I have realised that I worry too much. I realised that I was causing my own spots through my stress and anxiety, ironic really. So I have since created my own way of dealing with my spots both physically and emotionally.
Getting Into A Routine...
By getting myself into a routine I was able to get my skin to a point where I would need very little makeup of a day. I understand it's better to feel comfortable enough in your skin to go outside not wearing anything, but I don't think I will ever get there (and many others feel the same).
So what I do now is to remain more calm, as stress was a huge factor in my breakouts. I now do yoga, listen to calming music and use adult colouring books when I feel anxious. On top of this I have made sure to cut out as much junk food as possible, no more crisps or chocolate!
These can really help on their own, but for added effectiveness I make sure that I take my makeup off every day using a face wipe followed by micellar water to pick up anything left behind. I then make a Sudocrem face mask, wearing it for at least an hour.
Sudocrem is like a miracle in a bottle, it is meant mostly for nappy rash but really helps with spots and sores. By using it as a face mask you dry out any existing spots, calm down any sores left over but also prevent more spots from appearing.
Once your hour is up you simply use either cotton pads or tissue to remove the Sudocrem then apply your favourite moisturiser (I like to use Simple for my sensitive skin) to give back moisture to the skin.
Key Takeaways...
* Remember that you're not alone and that people love you regardless of your skin
* NEVER pick your spots, as hard as that may be
* Try to keep your stress and anxiety down with calming activities
* Don't rely on various special lotions and potions, try to stick to 1 or 2 tried and tested ones that are kind to your skin
* Let your skin air as much as you can and use makeup sparingly
* Do not lock yourself away or avoid people, it will only make you more anxious
Feature Image Credit: Frédéric Poirot via Flickr
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