1.
My plans: 2020:
2.
My phone just autocorrected shitful to shitcunt and I’ve never felt more Australian.
3.
They say the best things in life are free but sausage rolls usually cost between $3 and $5
4.
me: nooo you can't just put every flavour in milk australia: haha industrial blender go brrrr
5.
They’re calling the hosts THE FAB FOUR. I CANNOT!
6.
"It's no 'Untouched' by the Veronicas" - me as a music critic reviewing whatever
7.
Complimenting Avoiding traffic my boyfriend in Newtown 🤝 Go off King
8.
Ray White, what if we just said “hello” and left it at that
9.
*australian on the verge of total psychic collapse* look mate,
10.
Taking inspiration from birds and every few minutes just letting out a big scream
11.
I might not be girlfriend material but I’m definitely
12.
ok because the wiggles is trending i want everyone to know jeff is the most relatable wiggle because i too fall asleep at any given moment. like stop yelling "wake up jeff" he's tired leave him be
13.
People think Australian culture is about mateship and and lamingtons and stuff but mostly it’s about having to turn off wifi and use data in your own home
14.
why isn't there an australian word for "y'all" ?? like it sounds so forced and weird but "you all" sounds too angry and literal. don't even get me started on "yous"
15.
there's a sadness behind these eyes
16.
Responses to COVID-19 quarantines- ITALY: Music from balconies BRITS: Clap for workers EGYPT: pray from balconies US: Check on neighbours with notes under door GERMANY: sing from rooftops AUSTRALIA:
17.
2020: the year professionalism died.
18.
were you even a ‘00s kid growing up in australia unless you watched the simpsons at 6pm on channel 10 every weeknight
19.
The last great Australian dynasty
20.
Do you ever think about the fact that Mark Holden waving his arm and screaming 'touchdown' was the height of Australian TV for about 3 years?
21.
Australians don't use oven mitts because it's more fun to burn your hands on slightly damp tea towels.
22.
was walking behind a guy in a guzman y gomez hoodie and baseball cap and i kept thinking “damn this dude loves gyg, he’s a bloody maniac for a burrito” and didn’t realize until three minutes later that he probably just works there
23.
I changed my Siri to an Australian woman and when I asked her for recipe ideas all she suggested was vegemite toast and called me a cunt. I think I love her.
24.
australians be like moy naime is jiff
25.
everyone acts like it’s so easy to be Australian but possums keep breaking into my house and stealing fruit