Posted on Feb 16, 2021

21 Jokes From "The Good Place" That Deserve A Million Positive Points

"I haven't encountered this much resistance since I tried to get Timothée Chalamet to go out into the sun."

by Hope Lasater

BuzzFeed Staff

Tahani says, "Jason's making me watch this horror film about two ex-convicts who try to rob and murder a neglected child," and we see they're watching "Home Alone"

Jason says, "I don't know, this plan seems complicated," Eleanor says, "To be fair, you also once said that about an orange," and Jason says, "They don’t make sense, apples, you eat their clothes, but oranges, you don't"

Michael says, "How do I explain this concisely...this is Tuesdays, and also July," Janet says, "And sometimes it's never," and Michael says, "That's true, occasionally that moment on the Bearimy timeline is the time moment when nothing never occurs"

Chidi says, "This broke me, the dot over the I, that broke me"

Tahani says, "I haven't encountered this much resistance since I tried to get Timothée Chalamet to go out into the sun"

Shawn says, "So let's kick things off with our official Bad Place song," and Shawn and all of the demons sing, "1-877-Kars4Kids, K-A-R-S Kars4Kids"

Janet hands Jason a briefcase and says, "Here, I got you this to help your disguise," and Jason says, "Whoa, a briefcase, take my credit card to the hedge fund, I'll meet you at the martini store"

Chidi's shirt says, "Who what when where...wine"

Tahani says, "Jason, I never guessed we'd be where we are today, me, a prominent British philanthropist with award-winning legs, set to marry you, a swamp-dweller who once asked me if the presidents on Mount Rushmore have butts on the other side"

Michael shows his tattoo on his arm and says, "It's Chinese for Japan"

Eleanor says, "I used to think about how it's weird they don't make pants that are just one big pant leg for both your legs," Chidi says, "You mean a skirt," and Eleanor says, "No, you're not getting it and my thing is different, so shut up"

Tahani says, "Who’s your favorite artist," and Jason says, "I mean, Pitbull changed the game"

A librarian says, "The second we close, they use this place to shoot pornos," Michael says "Okay" and he and Eleanor leave, then at a diner a server says, "We're closing soon and the second we do, they use this place to shoot porn"

Chidi sings, "You put the Peeps in the chili pot and eat them both up, you put the Peeps in the chili pot and add the M&amp;Ms, you put the Peeps in the chili pot, it makes it taste...bad"

Jason says, "You know I love Jacksonville," Pillboi says, "J-town," and Jason says, It's easily one of the top 10 swamp cities in northeastern Florida"

A small bear wearing a shirt that says, "Epic Bacon Much" says, "Mondays, am I right," then holds up chainsaws and says, "CHAINSAW"

Eleanor says, "We’re an Arizona dirtbag, a human turtleneck, a narcissistic monster, and literally the dumbest person I have ever met," and Jason says, "And who am I, describe me now"

Michael says, "I want to see Eleanor Shellstrop's file, is that what you have or do you have a cactus" Janet says, "I have Eleanor Shellstrop's file, I do not have a cactus," Michael says, "Excellent, please, give me the file" and Janet hands him a cactus

Jason says, "If you're a devil, how come you’re not wearing Prada"

Jason says, "I think we're in the Bad Place," and Michael says, "Jason figured it out, Jason, this is a real low point, yeah, this one hurts"

Eleanor says, "Are we sure we should be paying attention to these guys, it's like, who died and left Aristotle in charge of ethics," and Chidi points to his whiteboard and says, "Plato"

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