1. Forrest Gump was actually a wizard
His “MAGIC” shoes he wears as a child allow him to thwart death and act as divine intervention countless times throughout history!
2. Everything in The Little Mermaid is a figment of Scuttle’s imagination
How else do you explain why Ariel doesn't just write Prince Eric a note about why she needs him to kiss her? Just look at this bozo.
3. Jack is a Terminator sent back in time to make sure a future soldier's mother is killed on board the Titanic
It's a way better explanation for the timeline inaccuracies that James Cameron obviously meant to plant.
4. It’s NOT a wonderful life in It’s a Wonderful Life
The family’s cool, but that fucking piece of the bannister is just going to keep breaking off FOREVER.
5. Danny and Sandy are killed at the end of Grease when Eugene bombs the carnival
6. The Minions are Nazi war criminals
If they've served history's greatest villains, it follows that they definitely served under Hitler at some point.
7. Marty actually travels to September 1955 rather than November 1955 in Back to the Future
8. The ghosts in Ghostbusters are hallucinations caused by a massive city-wide natural gas leak
9. Andy’s mom murdered her husband
10. Both the red pill AND the blue pill in The Matrix bring Neo to The Matrix
Morpheus is too smart to let the fate of the world rest in one dumb-faced man’s split-second decision.
11. Don Corleone is a puppet
The marionette strings on the title design aren’t some visual metaphor, but rather, an in-your-face clue that the Godfather is straight up made of crude latex and paint.