10 Times 80s Kids Movies Were So Wrong They Were Right

They don't make 'em like they used to. In the '80s, it seemed like movies targeted at kids had WAY more leeway -- and they were better for it.

1. When the penis breaks off the statue in The Goonies

"Oh my GOD! That's my mom's most favorite piece!"

2. And Mouth pranks the housekeeper

Haha, drugs and bondage! Oh, you Goonies. Is there a more universally loved kids movie that is maybe not actually suitable for kids?

3. When the Wolfman has gnards in The Monster Squad

Spoiler, those gnards get kicked.

4. When they call each other "butt love"

It's a term of endearment.

5. When the sister "doesn't speak German, she just sits around and lets guys touch her tits"...

... and Rudy gets uncomfortably close to proving that.

He's a peeping Tom!

6. When Elliott calls Michael "penis-breath" in E.T.

I agree, I think that should be a hyphenated word.

7. When Chris and the kids get in the way of a gang fight in Adventures in Babysitting...

"Don't fuck with the Lords of Hell". Eep!

...which results in one of the kids getting stabbed.

Kids have to learn somehow!

8. When Lucas sexualizes the Power Glove in The Wizard.

Cool shack, bro.

9. When Wolfgang totally wants to fuck that alien in Explorers.

10. When something happens in Labyrinth... Hmmm....

I can't remember what it was...

Hold on, it'll come to me...