How dancing boys can cure the technology blues!
It recently came to my attention (after several discussions with my dad) that I have been walking around WITHOUT the latest iOs version on my IPhone. Shame on me!! Apparently you are supposed to update these things every once and awhile. So I decided that I would do the whole grown up thing and instead of asking him to do it, I would do it myself because my dad always taught me that “if you want something done right then do it yourself”.
So I grab my laptop (which has been broken for about 6 months) say a little prayer to the technology Gods, close my eyes and turn it on. Low and behold it comes to life!! If my laptop can come back from the dead then this is meant to be so I quickly start the downloading process aware that my laptop could re-die at any minute.
I follow the online instructions and I sit and wait, and wait, and wait. So far everything is looking good, files and apps are transferring, my phone and all its contents are being backed up and i’m feeling pretty proud of myself because I haven’t asked for any help! 2 hours later it’s finally done and I can remove the device. All of a sudden I get really excited because my dad has made quite a big deal about iOs 5 and the iCloud and how it will “enhance the user experience” and how it’s going to make everything “easier”.
As soon as my phone restarts I type in my password and quickly start looking at all my folders to see all the exciting new changes. My smile slowly disappears as I realize that some of my really important things have just disappeared…mostly my 50 Shades of Grey books, some of my songs and some of my photos. How could this happen?!! I followed ALL the directions!!! I even downloaded the “how to” book for iOs 5. I check my iCloud, nothing there, I check my laptop, my files aren’t there and I just want to cry but I don’t.
I sit on my bed and close my eyes and try to remember what my life was like before iOs 5 and how I was happier and I had my books and my songs. It’s at that moment that I realize that there is a reason why I don’t do these things and that I should really just accept the fact that most of my knowledge is celebrity based.
It got me thinking that Hollywood should start making movies about this sort of thing. If Hollywood could take the leading man and somehow make him a bit more practical then the women of the world could really benefit from it. Here are a few of my movie suggestions!
You are on your bed, sad because your phone has deleted your stuff, and all of a sudden Channing Tatum bursts into the room, takes the phone, says “it’s going to be ok baby”, dances out of his shirt, grabs you and busts into some badass choreographed dance. That would totally make you forget the loss of your files!
Or in a romantic comedy, cut to the wedding scene. Ryan Gosling says “I promise to love and cherish you and always protect you from the evils of a new software update” Grab the kleenex ladies cause this one sounds like a real tear jerker!!
In the next Step Up movie why don’t you just write all the instructions on the guy from Step Up 4’s abs and just have him dance around. I would definitely pay attention the that!!
How about getting the cast of Magic Mike to film a 10 minute “how to update your phone software” video at the end of the movie. I would stay after the final credits to see that!
And it doesn’t have to stop at movies, it can even be applied to music.
Why not have Carly Rae Jepsen record a follow up song called “I just updated my Iphone software and I want to tell you how I did it so….. Call me maybe!” I mean her song has been so overplayed that we all know the words so why not take advantage of that and teach us something!
So Hollywood, if you are listening, PLEASE HELP US!!!!!!
- The public's mistrust of Trump might be especially dangerous in a catastrophe rooted in science — like an asteroid or the next Ebola.