30 Squirrely Signs You Went To Mary Baldwin College

Being a Fighting Squirrel isn’t just pearls, great legs, and pretty smiles. That’s just the tip of the iceberg…or Cannon Hill. Whichever.

1. You never get a day off of school unless for Apple Day or campus gets 30 ft of snow. Even then, you probably still have class.

We’re probably all going to die in this storm, but don’t forget to go to class!

2. Two words: Toned. calves.

In reality, MBC stands for Might Big Calves. These fine fellows are also quite big and toned.

3. Sometimes you question if that random person in the dining hall is someone’s boyfriend or a friend’s new look.

Oh… Hey girl! Love the new style!..

4. Squirrels aren’t just squirrels. And Apples aren’t just apples.

And once a year, Apple juice got a squirrel feelin’ loose.

5. Apple Eve Dodgeball is WAR.

But really, you’ll never see more desire from females to throw balls at each other and not get in trouble in return.

6. You know the meanings of the acronyms L.U.G. and B.U.G.

Taking a gander at other sexualities whilst in college and until you graduate is normal, right?

7. Your day gets a little bit better if you know there’s she-crab soup at Hunt Dining Hall.

But it really is so good.

8. You’ve developed an appreciation for traditions and a secret love for cheesy lines.

I love it. And I know you do too, Sister Squirrels.

9. There’s something magical about China House. Greasy, dark, magic.

Those dumplings…The duck sauce…You justify it by saying you’ll hike to the gym later.

10. You’re forever obligated to buy, take a picture, or gawk at something Squirrel related.

Your Sister Squirrels would understand, okay?!

11. Bingo isn’t just casual fun.

Estrogen is raging, and that kindle.. WILL BE MINE.

12. You’ve rolled down this hill at least once.

Or used it to get to the library faster. Or if you’re really feeling jazzy, both at the same time.

13. You’ve grown accustom to below freezing showers or fire alarms that like to go off when you’re in the shower.

Or naked in general. It’s like they know.

14. You can take a final on a whim.

No college is perfect…but our finals process is.

15. You can tell who’s a freshman simply by looking what’s wrapped around their necks.

Ah yiss, the famous Welcome Week lanyard and ID pouch. It’s okay ladies, we all did it.

16. You are generally categorized as either a TRAD or VWIL.

And we just can’t seem to get rid of it.

For outsiders, we mean, either a Virginia Women’s Institute for Leadership Cadet or Traditional student.

17. Speaking of VWIL, you know that they’re the blondes of campus.. Because they really do have more fun.

Minus the uniforms, confinement, early mornings, and….everything else.

18. You have perfected the science of the “shortcut”.

You can cut at least 3 minutes off if you walk behind the pub. FLAT LAND.

19. You truly believe our campus is the most beautiful.

Come on. It doesn’t get any prettier. I might, but I’ll save that for another day.

20. Pearls are a necessity.

They don’t call us Pearl Girls for nothin’!

21. You have yet to figure out how the ducks that show up in the spring ended up at the PAC


22. Freshman year living situation is an overall win.

In room sink and close to Hunt. ‘Nuff said.

23. You have to hike to the gym, only to be greeted with a vending machine full of snickers.

It’s a trip and a trap.

24. Turning 21 means Baja Bean…The bar side.

Or Pompeii Lounge for the classy folk.

25. Heels are saved for Signature Ball, and Mixers…

Because ain’t nobody trying to hike up hills in heels. Oh, lookie there, that was some nice alliteration. Thanks liberal arts education.

26. Your second favorite time of year

MAY TERM PLAY TERM! JT knows what’s up.

27. You felt like this guy after signing up for the 9am arts class in Deming.

Which is why you avoided it as long as possible. Legs don’t work till at least 11am.

Unless you’re VWIL, then you’ve got it made. But you were up and in uniform at 4am anyways.

28. Even ‘Feminist Ryan Gosling’ has opinions on MBC Spirit Week.

We could always use more school spirit. Ryan Gosling is good incentive.

29. How you feel about men after only about a month of being at MBC.

And then pretty much the rest of your life.

30. Despite all our complaints, we love MBC and most importantly, each other.

Boldly Baldwin women and Fighting Squirrels for life!

Sorry, this got mushy fast. I’m done now.

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