We Made Elementary School Crafts As Adults And This Is What Happened

We got grade-schooled.

Inspired by the artsy and crafty all-in-one Canon PIXMA printer, we asked our friends and co-workers if they’d like to make art of their own.

Here’s what happened next:

Melissa: How did kids do this with safety scissors?
Iván: Well, we have to end up being better than kids.
Mandy: Oh, is that the goal? To be better than the kids?
Iván: My personal goal is.

Melissa: I’m using my dress as inspiration. And also, I think it’ll be easier to cut straight lines.
Mandy: My hope is that mine will turn into a spider, but it’ll probably just look like throw-up.
Iván: This does require a lot more thinking when you’re an adult. When you’re a kid, you just start hacking into it.
Mandy: Yeah, exactly! There’s no inspiration. They’re stupid.

 

Download our printable template HERE.

Allison: I have no idea what to do, and these guys are killing it.
Hannah: Maybe you were sick this day. That’s how I’m like with percents. I don’t know how to do them because I missed that day at school.
Clark: Percents? You missed the entire semester?
Hannah: I got like the chicken pox or something. I was busy. After fractions, I guess I needed a break. I just took a personal day.

Allison: So the face is blue?
Hannah: It’s blue around his eyes, their eyes. Are turkeys all boys? I’m having a very troubling memory experience here. They’re not all boys, right?
Clark: No!
Allison: I don’t know enough about animals.

 

Instructions HERE.

Rena: This way, Abel — Abel, this way.
Abel: I’m really struggling.
Mark: Abel, your name is kind of a misnomer here. It doesn’t sound like you’re able to do this.
Abel: I still don’t know what I did wrong. Rena upstaged everyone right now.
Rena: You know what, I just use my imagination.

 

Instructions HERE.

Julie: This is great. You know, you get to work and then it’s like, “Hey, make a leaf wreath.”
Chris: Ooh, this one’s not even a leaf.
Julie: That’s a pigeon feather, and I hope you wash your hands now.
Chris: Never.
Alix: You got all the best leaves!

Julie: I was a Girl Scout my whole life. This is my jam. Scissors, gluing random stuff on other stuff, calling it something else…
Chris: I did a lot of puzzles when I was a kid. My mom got me into this — oh, this is going to be such a terrible humblebrag — she got me into the gifted and talented stuff.
Alix: I’ve given up. Is that OK? You guys can leave.
Chris: I choose not to leaf you behind.

 

Instructions HERE.

Fred: So now push… Go like this with your thumbs, go like this — in the opposite direction. You wanna go like this and make sure your crease is outside like this. So close. Actually you need to fold again. The other way.
Dara: That didn’t take long.
Fred: It’s starting to look like a frog. This is a prehistoric origami frog. One of the ancestors.

Fred: My frog lives in an industrial part of the United States so he can’t really jump well.
Dara: It’s only going backwards or flipping upside down. Go forwards!
Fred: Mine only goes straight up. It’s a very upwardly mobile frog. Check it out. It’s not that bad. I think we reached our sense of childlike wonder. Or something.

 

Instructions HERE.

Andy: It’s gross but I used to fold it and then lick it and then tear it.
Claire: Why lick it?
Andy: To moisten it so it tears easy.
Claire: Eww.
Andy: Well, I’m going to do it my way.

 

Claire: What’s a good fortune by 13-year-old standards?
Andy: Like, “You will find five dollars”?
Claire: Yeah, ‘cause that’s like lunch money.
Andy: That goes a long way.
Claire: Also, that’s a lot of candy from the vending machine.

Andy: Last but not least, something bad: “You will fart in class.”
Claire: Yeah, and people look. ‘Cause I feel like now you can do it and no one cares.
Andy: What? In what world can you do it and no one cares?
Claire: I’ve done it before.

Instructions HERE.

Renee: I feel like I’m gonna break these crayons. I don’t know how to hold a crayon anymore.
Leah: I have literally no recollection of art class.
Renee: I just remember you’d bring in an old shirt as a smock.
Leah: Yeah, that I did. Apparently [that was] all I did in my art class.

 

Allie: Your grass looks very nice.
Leah: Thank you! Your rocket ship looks great.
Allie: Really? Thanks, I was trying to avoid it looking inappropriate. That was actually my main goal.
Leah: You did good, you did good.

 

Instructions HERE.

Jessica: Nobody in my department is going to eat this. They already told me.
Swara: Really? They’re all like salad people?
Jessica: No, not even that. They just don’t trust me.

Jessica: There’s no way into this house. I wonder if I should try to make a door.
Arielle: You should totally make a door. How else are you gonna get in?
Jessica: Good point.
Swara: I don’t have that problem. In mine, you just climb into it.

Jessica: I just have to put glitter on everything.
Arielle: I do like your aesthetic.
Jessica: Right? I think kindergarteners are going to be jealous of my work.
Swara: I’m so glad I’m not being graded for this. I had to repeat first grade for reasons like this.

Instructions HERE.

Garrett: How do I make a circle? I almost didn’t pass kindergarten ‘cause I couldn’t cut.
Jaclyn: When I was in kindergarten, the teachers used to redo my work because they didn’t think it was good enough. My mom got really upset one day and had a conference about it, ‘cause they would take my work and do it.
Chelsea: When I was in kindergarten, I fell asleep during nap time and didn’t wake up and my mom had to pick me up.

 

Chelsea: Look at those lips. Those are some good lips.
Garrett: Some serious brows on that one.
Chelsea: Uh, those are her beautiful eyelashes. She has mascara on. Wait, where is your mouth?
Garrett: I have it on the wrong side.
Chelsea: Oh, you just don’t have a mouth.
Jaclyn: I feel like it’s fine. It goes with his personality.

Instructions HERE.

Ashley: I just feel a disaster coming on, opening this glitter.
Kim: I mean, how is a small child supposed to do this?
Ashley: It’s impossible.
Kim: I feel like I’m defusing a bomb.

Kim: This is taking me back to when you used to get glue on your hand, and you’d peel it off. It’s weird. The smell is like a sensory recall from my childhood.
Ashley: I think the last time I actually crafted, I was babysitting a 5-year-old and a 7-year-old. And I was like, “Let’s all draw together.” I was maybe 13 or 14. And the mom came back and was like, “That’s so good!” I was like, “I made that.” And she just looked at me like, I thought a 7-year-old did that.

 

Instructions HERE.

Elysia: OK, what’s next? Do we let them dry for a while?
Kim: Do you have a hairdryer? Oh, there’s one in the girl’s bathroom!
Elysia: Do you wanna get it?

Elysia: Oh god. I’m not good at blowdrying macaroni.
Kim: Someone’s gonna come in here a day or two from now and be like, “Whose gross lunch is on the floor?”

Elysia: Fun fact for everyone: My dad is a jeweler.
Kim: He’s gonna be so proud. I think my mom actually still has a piece of macaroni jewelry that I made for her.
Elysia: She wears it?
Kim: I hope not.

Kim: Macaroni is the ultimate children’s medium. Like, you did so many things with it. You made those little paintings where half of it fell off before you got home, and your mom had to pretend that she was really happy…
Elysia: …and knew what it was. Oh, no. Is glue easy to get off clothing? I forget.

Instructions HERE.

Jennifer: You have flour all over your mouth.
Julia: I’m such a damn mess.
Katelyn: Apparently it’s no different when adults do crafts, from kids.
Julia: I’m also wearing black, which I think is a big mistake.
Katelyn: You need to wipe your face.

Jennifer: According to my globe, Europe is clearly right next to California.
Katelyn: What is this? Oh, Australia.
Jennifer: Right. OK, so Australia’s gonna go here. Just ‘cause I have space.
Julia: I think I’m gonna get creative about where I think the Philippines are.

Jennifer: Stop looking at mine! But yours actually looks— like this is Africa, right? Or South America, one of the two.
Katelyn: Africa.
Jennifer: See, yours looks decent.

Instructions HERE.

Justine: This could be anything right now. It could be a horse, it could be a cow…
Ben: I mean, that’s a testament to your skill. Mine right now is anything fat.
Justine: Are you good at this? Are you going to totally outshine me?
Ben: I am kind of crafty. I’m not gonna lie. My undergrad was in architecture, so I kinda majored in crafts.

 

Justine: Do elephants have long legs? I forget.
Ben: No, they have those cute stubbies.
Justine: Stubbies! This is without a doubt the most fun thing I’ll do all week.
Ben: I love data engineering. Just as fun. Different, kinda similar though. You need a plan, you use your fingers a lot…

Instructions HERE.

Walter: Oh, you have a wider base than I do.
Justine: I told you, I like that flat bottom look.
Walter: It’s also starting to look ellipsoidal.
Justine: What?
Walter: Like an ellipse. Ellipsoidal?
Anne Louise: Yeah, I just learned that word too. Just now.

Anne Louise: How about this? I’ll make lips out of pipe cleaner and then we’ll make teeth.
Justine: OK. That’s gonna be terrifying-looking, though.
Anne Louise: What do you think?
Justine: I’m going to see this in my nightmares later.

Walter: This is actually soothing, to massage out the yeast.
Anne Louise: You’re good at stirring.
Justine: We all have our skills.
Walter: Together, we can do this once.

Instructions HERE.

You’re never too old for crafts, and the Canon PIXMA printer makes it easier than ever to channel your inner grade-school artist.

Photo credit: Spencer Bergen / © BuzzFeed 2015

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