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18 Steps To Posting An Instagram In This Generation

Who knew posting a picture online could cause so much emotional and mental damage?

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HOW NORMAL PEOPLE INSTAGRAM:

And how EVERYONE should Instagram

Step 1: Decide to take a picture, take the picture.

Oliver Rossi / Getty Images / Via i.huffpost.com

Step 2: Post the picture.

Done.
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Done.

HOW THIS GENERATION INSTAGRAMS:

Step 1: Choosing the unlucky photographer.

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They may get the shot in one take, or have to stay for 677 takes.

Step 2: Make sure the scene is PERFECT.

Via 2o7fsh4anuayrnrhe3us6v71.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com

PERFECT LIGHTING, PERFECT SCENERY, PERFECT POSE

Step 3: EVERYONE in the picture has to act as if they aren't aware a picture is being taken.

This includes: Trying to make yourself laugh, looking to the side for an artistic look, pretending you're having too good of a time to even notice a camera.
Unknown / Via img.4plebs.org

This includes: Trying to make yourself laugh, looking to the side for an artistic look, pretending you're having too good of a time to even notice a camera.

Step 4: Review the picture.

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Does it need a retake? DOES IT? If so, EVERYONE must do the exact same pose as before.

Step 5: Ask for your peers' opinion on the picture.

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Text your core 5 besties to get their approval.

"Do I look good? No I don't care how you look, do I look good?"

"Insta worthy? Yeah, okay good thats what I thought"

Step 6: DON'T FORGET to add a WHITE frame to the picture.

Because nobody likes a full screen Instagram, that’s social suicide.
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Because nobody likes a full screen Instagram, that’s social suicide.

Step 7: Add a filter, or edit it to really make it POP.

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But DO NOT let the filter affect the white boarder, or else youll have to re-crop, and add a new white boarder. A contaminated white boarder will get you LESS LIKES!

Step 8: Send your finished product to friends for their confirmation BEFORE posting it.

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P.S If ANYONE critiques it....dump them as a friend.

Step 9: Think of an AMAZING caption.

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A caption is very risky and complicated. They make or break a post.

"Should I use emojis?"

"Is this funny? Do you get it?"

HASHTAGS are so 2013.

Step 10: Warn your core 5 friends that you're about to post.

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If they don’t 'like' it within the first 5 seconds, you will kill them, won't like their next pic or worse…unfollow them.

Step 10.5: LOOK AT THE TIME!

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STEP 10 WAS A TEST! YOU FAILED AND PROBABLY GOT NO LIKES!

You want to post your picture at a time where everyone will have their phone available. You won't get likes if people are at work or at school.

Times to post: 11-12pm / 7-9pm on weekdays, 7-10pm on Friday and Saturday and ANYTIME on Sunday.

Step 11: Post your picture and tell yourself you actually don’t care about how many likes it gets...

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And promise yourself that you wont look at Instagram til tomorrow.

Step 12: Do the COMPLETE opposite and refresh your newsfeed every 2 minutes to see if it's getting any 'likes'.

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ESPECIALLY check to see if the LIKE COUNT is exceeding the TIME IT WAS POSTED!

Example: 15 likes - posted 5 minutes ago.

Step 13: If the likes do NOT exceed the time it was posted, contemplate taking it down and feel a lot of shame.

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Just note, if you take it down, people may notice...and you will be the laughing stock of Instagram.

Step 14: If the likes exceed the time it was posted for at least the first hour, you deserve a well-rested sleep for a job well done.

Step 15: The next day, follow up with some people who haven’t liked your picture yet and force them to like it.

Via tinypic.com

It's not an easy thing to do, but some people need to be called out.

We all have those friends that don't want us to get a lot of likes. Jealous haters.

Step 16: You expect your picture to get 100+ likes, and it doesn't.

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You actually thought your picture was worth 100 likes, that's cute.

Step 17: When/If your picture hits 100 likes, you feel like you're the hottest, most popular, badass bitch...

...you're not.But on the outside you pretend like you didn't even notice or care...just to look THAT much cooler.
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...you're not.

But on the outside you pretend like you didn't even notice or care...just to look THAT much cooler.

Step 18: Repeat in 1-2 weeks...

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...because NOBODY likes people who Instagram too frequently! Don't hate the player, hate the game.

This is the world we now live in.

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