A Brief History Of Fad Diets As Told By Primates

It's time to follow through with those resolutions folks. So quit monkeying around.

1911-Fletcherization

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This term was coined by a 20th century foodie named Horace Fletcher. Fletcher argued claimed that for good health, it was necessary to completely chew every bite of food before swallowing.

1925-Cigarette Diet

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Quite possibly one of the most successful ad campaigns/controversial diets of the 20th century, Albert Lasker and Lucky Strike urged women to, "Reach for a Lucky instead of a sweet."

1930- Slimming Soap

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In the 1930s, products such as “Fatoff” and “Fat-O-NO” promised that consumers would slim down if they lathered up.

1950-Russian Peasant Diet

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While on this low-cal cabbage soup based diet, pounds won't be the only thing you'll be losing. Cabbage fueled flatulence will surely have your friends seeking asylum quicker than Snowden after an NSA leak.

1964- The Drinking Man's Diet

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This bro-friendly diet works on the premise that so long as you don't ingest any carbohydrates, you can imbibe all of the alcohol you want and still lose weight.

Is butter a carb?

1976- The Sleeping Beauty Diet

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Simple logic- you can't eat while you're asleep. Championed by none other than 'The King' himself, followers of the diet sedate themselves to keep from indulging.

1999- Juice Fasting

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This diet consists of ingesting nothing but juices. If this diet seems too strict to you, consider combining it with 'The Drinking Man's Diet' and voila, you have 'The Joose Diet'.

2014- Mcdonald's diet

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Contrary to Morgan Spurlock's 'Super Size Me', a high school science teacher claims to have recently lost 37 lbs after eating nothing but Mc D's for 90 days. In this humble dieter's opinion, the chances of recreating this pedagogue's success are Mcdoubtful.