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16 Times Hipsters Ruined Coffee For The Rest Of Us

Actually, can I just get it in a cup instead of an avocado? Thanks.

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1. When the hipster baristas thought it'd be cute to serve a latte out of an avocado.

Really, there was no need to do this.
@naomi_dsouza / Via instagram.com

Really, there was no need to do this.

2. And then when they took it a step further and poured coffee into an orange.

Instagram: @we_natives

It probably tastes good, but it's not the best way to drink your coffee.

3. And then a kiwi. Why?

Like, why not just serve coffee from your own cupped hand, at this rate?
@dailydoseofvitaminsea / Via instagram.com

Like, why not just serve coffee from your own cupped hand, at this rate?

4. Just say no when a hipster barista offers you a unicorn coffee.

Who came up with this shit?
@ladypineapple / Via instagram.com

Who came up with this shit?

5. Of course, there's always the opposite option: when your barista makes you a "goth coffee" with charcoal.

Yes, the same charcoal that, according to bloggers, purifies water, whitens your teeth, cleans mold off your siding, and allegedly has anti-aging properties.
@mister_to_barista / Via instagram.com

Yes, the same charcoal that, according to bloggers, purifies water, whitens your teeth, cleans mold off your siding, and allegedly has anti-aging properties.

6. When hipsters decide to make you do all the work with "deconstructed" coffee.

A snobby beverage that not only costs you more, but that you have to prepare yourself and leave a tip for, obviously.
@the_hungry_hen / Via instagram.com

A snobby beverage that not only costs you more, but that you have to prepare yourself and leave a tip for, obviously.

7. When hipster baristas put flowers on a latte to make it look ~tropical~.

[Flower voiceover]: "We were grown for THIS?"
@roxanasalatiuan / Via instagram.com

[Flower voiceover]: "We were grown for THIS?"

8. I mean, who in their right mind wants to eat dry flowers with their coffee?

I don't.
@greenseggsandsam / Via instagram.com

I don't.

9. They even created this romantic coffee with rose petals on top of the foam.

I bet that when you drink it, the little roses get stuck in your teeth and you look super trendy.
@plucky_vegan / Via instagram.com

I bet that when you drink it, the little roses get stuck in your teeth and you look super trendy.

10. When they add marshmallows, sprinkles, and rose coloring to a simple and innocent coffee.

What did this coffee do to them?
@caravanandtonic / Via instagram.com

What did this coffee do to them?

11. And let's talk about the idea of adding cotton candy to coffee.

instagram.com

(Deep sigh.)

12. Or when they add beet juice because...why not?

If you want something pretty and pink, go drink a milkshake instead.
@thecoreswindon / Via instagram.com

If you want something pretty and pink, go drink a milkshake instead.

13. When the hipsters started the fad of serving coffee from an ice cream cone (no ice cream included).

We don't doubt that this may taste good, but 1) it's not practical, and 2) why don't we leave the cone for ice cream and the cup for coffee?
@coffeeinaconeaus / Via instagram.com

We don't doubt that this may taste good, but 1) it's not practical, and 2) why don't we leave the cone for ice cream and the cup for coffee?

14. Hipsters are also to blame for espresso tonic.

Which is espresso served over iced tonic soda. Thanks, but no thanks.
@finchonlocke / Via instagram.com

Which is espresso served over iced tonic soda. Thanks, but no thanks.

15. Then there's this blue algae latte, which looks like something a Smurf might drink.

Perfect for anyone who's more concerned with Instagram likes than enjoying a good cup of coffee.
@veggiedublin

Perfect for anyone who's more concerned with Instagram likes than enjoying a good cup of coffee.

16. And there's no forgetting this invention: coffee that you can spread on your toast, so you can have a "full breakfast".

Two in one.
flatbrew.com / Via Facebook: FlatBrew

Two in one.

Anyway, long live classic black coffee, free of hipster intrusions.

ABC

This post was translated from Spanish.

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