You Need To Read These Angry Amazon Reviews Of Fart Toys
"My son downloaded this app without my permission!!!"
by
BuzzFeed Staff
by
BuzzFeed Staff
Amazon has everything. Really...everything. If you search the word "fart," there are over 20 pages filled with fart-related apps, toys, and decor.
And just like the rest of the products on Amazon, customers have the ability to rate and review these fart-related products. So...is it possible to give farts, an almost universally hated bodily phenomenon, a good review?
Life hack: if you really want to commit to your love of fart toy reviews, listen to this week's episode of BuzzFeed's Internet Explorer podcast!
1. Here's the "Big Ass Horn Fart Gun" in all its glory.
Seems like it's not that big.
Via amazon.com
2. Let's check out the reviews for this remote-controlled fart machine:
Oh my god, David.
amazon.com
David is a horrible friend.
They lied to you, Kyle!!!!
3. Here's something called "Le Tooter."
This guy practiced for TWO. HOURS.
...SEVERAL HOURS?!!!
Lots of passion in this one.
THERE ARE YOUTUBE TUTORIALS.
YouTube
Who are these people?
4. This looks cute, but let's see what the customers say.
Via amazon.com
This Father's Day, skip the "#1 Dad" mug and get him the farting hippo he deserves.
"A2ZMom" is unhappy with hippo toots.
5. What a description.
Via amazon.com
* Fart
* Fart Fart Fart
* Fart Fart
Wow. Cool brag, JW.
Via amazon.com
HONK!
6. Up next is a fart pen.
Via amazon.com
"Finger Fart Finger."
"The noise was horrible, but, wow, it got here so fast!"
Via amazon.com
Paulette is complaining about a gift she didn't even buy. What she should really be doing, instead, is confronting her mean friends directly.
Via amazon.com
7. This clock has a big mouth and a big butt. What a deal!
amazon.com
$64??????
Oh my god.
8. Aww! Another stuffed toy.
Mmm...gurgly farts.
In addition to novelty gifts, Amazon has over 100 fart sound apps listed.
Amazon
Here are some of the best reviews:
9. Is this dude mad at himself for downloading the app?
10. Kells!! Are you OK??
11. It's always good to leave something to the imagination.
12. Theodore just slam-dunked on his husband.
13. C'mon, Amazon. Only four fart types? That's just insulting.
For a good time, read the next three reviews in a funny old person voice:
14. *Shakes cane*
15. Those dang kids!
16. "Awful" equals "awful" minus "my granddaughter" comes to a total of $0.00.
17. "Grow up already!!!"
18. This one ends with a recommendation for another fart app.
19. You can't even choose the type of fart?! But this is America!
