1. You never go anywhere without your phone.
2. Alcohol makes you extremely social.
3. After the first drink, your phone becomes one thing with your hand.
4. In case of need you've perfected the ancient technique of "texting while holding a tumbler with the same hand"
5. You have a couple recurrent "targets".
6. 3/4 of them are ex boyfriends/girlfriends.
7. Of course, when sober, you'll never even dream of texting those people.
8. Some people know by now that if they hear from you, you are drunk.
9. You're not picky when it comes to choose a "drunk texting pal".
10. You're an excellent multitasker.
11. At first, you'll also correct your typos.
12. After a while your thumbs will run free across the keys, composing nonsensical texts that seem perfectly fine to you.
13. Your best friends have learned to understand your special drunk language.
14. There's something that can bring you from drunk texting to sexting.
15. The morning after you remember 50% of the conversations.
16. And you regret 100% of them.
17. You swear it'll be the last time.
18. Your shame and regret will be the starting point of a full set of new texts to last weekend victims.
19. But you're secretly proud of your extroverted, brilliant and flirty (drunk) self.
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