Skip To Content
  • lol badge

34 Reasons To Never Visit Portugal

Run you fools!

1. People say Portugal is a breathtaking country...

Husond / Via en.wikipedia.org

Azenhas do Mar in Sintra.

2. But you've got to wonder why Portuguese people are so proud of their country.

Paola Spartà / Via Flickr: mbaruzza_2

3. Portugal has no charm.

Pablo Nieto / Via Flickr: rapidoelectro

4. Not even a little bit!

hom26 / Via Flickr: hom26

Sintra.

5. Who would want to lie on beaches like this one?

Daniel Antunes / Via Flickr: danielantunes

Aljezur.

6. Look at the color of the water — it's just gross!

Tamires Minuk / Via Flickr: tataminuk

Madeira.

7. Let's talk about Porto for a minute...

Raul Lieberwirth / Via Flickr: lanier67

8. Seriously, what is this thing?

Pepe Martin / Via Flickr: pepemartin

Maria Pia Bridge (built by Gustave Eiffel).

9. The whole place is just charmless.

mat's eye / Via Flickr: matte0ne

10. This is an offense to my eyes.

Humberto Santos / Via Flickr: hfmsantos

11. And Lisbon isn't much better...

ilirjan rrumbullaku / Via Flickr: 125701341@N07

12. The whole city lives in the past.

hugo n. / Via Flickr: higaara

13. And the tramway is just painful to look at.

Andrea Moroni / Via Flickr: bandytam

14. What is this? Where are we? San Francisco??

Jaime Silva / Via Flickr: 20792787@N00

25 de Abril Bridge in Lisbon.

15. Portuguese landscapes are in no way poetic.

Mariusz Kluzniak / Via Flickr: 39997856@N03

Tavira.

16. And everybody knows the country has zero history.

F Mira / Via Flickr: fhmira

Park and National Palace of Pena, Sintra.

17. Everything there is unremarkable and ugly.

Diego Delso / Via en.wikipedia.org

Porto's city hall.

18. The architecture in the country is so boring.

Bernt Rostad / Via commons.wikimedia.org

Belém Tower, Lisbon.

19. Lame!

Alvesgaspar / Via en.wikipedia.org

Padrão dos Descobrimentos, Lisbon.

20. Seriously, this place has no class.

Juan Lois / Via Flickr: caese

Santa Luzia.

21. It's just vile.

Alvesgaspar / Via fr.wikipedia.org

Pegões aqueduct.

22. A pile of old stones with zero appeal.

François Saulnier / Via Flickr: bibulus

Jerónimos Monastery, Lisbon.

23. And don't even get me started on the food.

Azchael / Via Flickr: azchael

24. Ew.

Azchael / Via Flickr: azchael

25. I mean, who on earth enjoys Porto?

Guglielmo Ferri / Via Flickr: gugfer

26. Oh, and Fado is lame too.

Anefo / Mieremet, R. / Via fr.wikipedia.org

Amália Rodrigues.

27. Portugal has no memorable celebrities.

Chris Deahr / Via fr.wikipedia.org

Cristiano Ronaldo.

28. Seriously, who's ever heard of Luís Figo??

Ludovic Péron / Via commons.wikimedia.org

29. Portuguese people are so boring.

Raimond Spekking / Via commons.wikimedia.org

30. And unpleasant.

Pedro Ribeiro Simões / Via Flickr: pedrosimoes7

31. No really, this country is just plain ugly.

Eider Palmou / Via Flickr: garaigoikoa

Ponta da Piedade.

32. Don't bother.

Moinho tipico / Via Flickr: franciscoantunes

Moinho Tipico.

33. Just stay home...

Jose Maria Cuellar / Via Flickr: cuellar

Lisbon.

34. And never come to Portugal!

Aires Almeida / Via Flickr: 31212180@N08

Praia do Vau (Algarve).

BuzzFeed Daily

Keep up with the latest daily buzz with the BuzzFeed Daily newsletter!

Newsletter signup form