So Guess What This Woman Was Doing When She Was Pulled Over

This Cincinnati woman was pulled over for overly tinted windows. While searching the car, police found crack, a crack pipe and... Well, we'll just let the police report inform you in that hilariously dry, matter-of-fact fashion that make police reports the deadpan comedy geniuses of the official document world. She was, uh, "driving a stick."

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• "The operator was also observed with her pants unbuttoned and a vibrator in her lap. She advised that she had been using it while watching a video on the computer the passenger was holding."