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    Posted on Jul 1, 2013

    13 Desserts That Have Been Mocked And Slandered By Yogurt

    Q: How do you make any dessert sad? A: Add yogurt to the end of its name.

    1. Apple Turnover

    walmart.com

    "My diet? Well, yesterday I had an apple turnover..."

    NO YOU DIDN'T YOU LITERALLY ATE APPLE-FLAVORED GELATINOUS DAIRY.

    2. Red Velvet Cake

    wordpress.com

    YOU CAN'T JUST DYE A BUNCH OF LIVE ACTIVE CULTURES RED AND TELL ME THEY TASTE LIKE CAKE!!!

    3. Strawberry Cheesecake

    theimpulsivebuy.com

    Apparently, 87% of women suffer from digestive issues like irregularity, but now 100% of us suffer from the pain of associating our favorite kind of cheesecake with this goop that gives you the runs.

    4. Cinnamon Rolls

    store.potomacgourmetmarket.com

    Mmm, just how I like my cinnamon rolls: cold, soupy, and full of millions of dying bacteria.

    5. Black Forest Cake

    6. Key Lime Pie

    walmart.com

    Makes for a great treat when you want to recreate the taste of vomiting up a margarita and then immediately swallowing 3 cups of sugar.

    7. Rainbow Sherbet

    Flickr: theimpulsivebuy

    The perfect snack for when I want to eat a mediocre version of a preexisting mediocre dessert.

    8. Strawberry Shortcake

    yourptchris.blogspot.com

    The taste of this yogurt is indistinguishable from plain strawberry yogurt. Unless Yoplait is dealing with some next-level Willy Wonka cooking sorcery, there's no way they've replicated the taste of a flaky biscuit in yogurt form.

    9. Peach Cobbler

    artpark78.com

    Once again, it is MORALLY and ETHICALLY wrong to consider anything that rapidly accelerates bowel movements as dessert.

    10. Birthday cake

    foodette-reviews.blogspot.com

    A quick and easy way to wish a happy birthday...TO YOUR WORST ENEMY MAUAHAHA.

    11. Banana Cream Pie

    walmart.com

    LITERALLY JUST BANANA-FLAVORED YOGURT. YOU CAN'T ADD "CREAM" FLAVOR TO A PRODUCT THAT IS, BY NATURE, CREAM FLAVORED.

    12. Triple Berry Torte

    gianteagle.com

    Can you taste all three individual berries??? Because I can only taste REGRET.

    13. Cosmopolitan

    inspiredtaste.net

    (Technically a cocktail, but a dessert for MANY)

    multivu.com

    GIRLS' NIGHT IN, AMIRITE LADIES? HAHAHA...HA...-weeps-.