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    18 Little Everyday Embarrassments That You'll Never Come Back From

    "Credit or debit?" "Yes."

    1. When someone says "happy birthday" and you respond with "you too."

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    But I suppose there's always a 1 in 365 chance that it's their birthday too.

    2. That moment you say, "Good, and you?" after someone says, "Good, and you?"

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    You're such a gifted conversationalist.

    3. The irritation of realizing you just said "goodnight" at eight in the morning.

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    4. And nothing shows off your good manners better than when you say "pardon me" after bumping into a... table.

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    I'm sure if the table could talk, they'd appreciate the apology.

    5. And isn't it odd how embarrassing it can be to fill up your hand with conditioner instead of shampoo?

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    Nobody else saw it happen and it's such a small error. Why is it so humiliating?

    6. And let's not forget those handshakes that turn into lame half hugs.

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    "Hey, good seeing you agai– oop! Oh, okay. We're huggi– oop. Uh, sorry."

    7. And never quite knowing what to do when someone from another country comes in for a cheek kiss.

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    I understand this is customary, but can I just opt out?

    8. That feeling you have after saying "thanks" to someone when you've just done them a favor.

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    At best, you look like an idiot. At worst, you look like a passive-aggressive idiot.

    9. Waiter: "Credit or debit?" You: "Yes."

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    Quick, just accidentally say "I love you" when you leave and get out of there.

    10. Saying "nice to meet you" to someone you've already met.

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    Manners < memory.

    11. Or worse, complimenting someone before realizing you're talking to the wrong person.

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    "Hey, great job on that report!" "What report?"

    12. You haven't suffered until you've called the same wrong number twice and had the same person pick up both times.

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    Has anyone died from this yet?

    13. Almost getting on an escalator going the wrong direction.

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    At least you made a stranger laugh. It's nice to brighten up someone's day.

    14. And back at school, how about that day when you accidentally called your teacher "mom"?

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    Even if it was years ago, that embarrassment always feels fresh.

    15. You die a little bit every time you try to swipe your work ID to get on the train or bus and vice versa.

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    Why are you like this?

    16. Saying "thanks" when you meant to apologize.

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    "Ouch. You're standing on my foot." "Thanks."

    17. Saying goodbye to someone then realizing in horror that you're both walking in the same direction.

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    Time to scramble to make more small talk!

    18. And, of course, that moment you accidentally yell "HELLO?" in response to the door bell instead of "I'M COMING!".

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    You'll never get over the pain.

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