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87 Random Thoughts I Had As A 27 Year Old When I Went To A One Direction Concert Alone

I went to the MetLife Stadium on August 5th to see One Direction with a million ten year-old girls and it was glorious.

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87 Thoughts I Had As A 27 Year Old Woman at a One Direction Concert

Faye Kilburn

1. Ooo the MetLife stadium is impressive

2. Oh...my...God, it's full of twelve year olds

3. Why are they screaming? It's just a commercial for One Direction's new perfume

4. A girl in front of me just said she'd literally drink the perfume. Literally.

5, Hmm. They cheered for Niall the loudest. Not Harry. Interesting.

6. I wonder if they had to cut Zayn out of that commercial

7. I wonder how they will sound without Zayn

8. Who will sing the high notes? Liam?

9. Ugh, the teenagers next to me have got a selfie stick. Revolting

10. Stop snapchatting, you morons

11. I have literally no faith in the future generation

12. A couple of twelve year olds behind me are discussing ways to storm on stage. #rebellion in section 13.

13. And finally One Direction come on stage and my eardrums just burst from the screaming

14. Clouds is an odd choice of song to start with

15. They sound great though

16. FIREWORKS!!!

17. Niall's "playing" guitar. Bless

18. Yeah, I don't miss Zayn at all

19. Steal My Girl and Where Do Broken Hearts go are fine songs and I'll hear no more about it

20. They just fired streamers into the air. It's magnificent!!

21. Stockholm Syndrome is the weirdest song ever

22. Harry just threw water over us all and I nearly died

23. They just sang Fireproof which is a vocal-harmonies type track and it sounds fine without Zayn. Liam did the high notes and I didn't hate it

24. I didn't realize how much of a big personality Liam is

25. Louis on the other hand hasn't even made one reference to his baby drama.

26. Oh no they're doing Night Changes and its giving me all the feels. Niall steps in and sings Zayn's part and for the first time I miss Zayn

27. Niall just "tanked" us for being here and introduced a song called "Where you belong"

28. The whole audience has got their cell phones out

29. I'm getting my cell phone out

30. I'm going to do a 360 degree video on my phone to capture this glorious moment

31. Oh shit I forgot to press record

32. Be still my beating heart, they are singing Little Things. Another number that requires vocal harmonies and they are on point.

33. Zayn who?

34. JK it's Malik. Never forget

35. I wonder what Zayn's first concert will be like.

36. It'll probably be sold out because all these One Direction fans are sheep

37. I'll probably go though

38. Harry's just asked the stadium to scream on the count of three.

39. Why is he doing this?

40. One

41. Two

42. Three

43. ARGGHHHHOHMYGODILOVEYOUSTYLESEEEE!!!

44. I legitimately have gone deaf

45. Niall just told us all to turn to whoever we came with and tell them we love them

46. I came by myself. Again

47. The mom I'm stood next to just turned to me and told me she loves me. She's not my mom. I don't know her. This is weird

48. Niall just grabbed his crotch and the stadium is having a collective hot flush

49. That was raunchy Niall. There are children here you know.

50. The mom next to me just yelled "Niall, you sexy Irish beast". No lie.

51. We are now singing Happy Birthday to a girl in the audience. Harry is literally serenading her.

52. I'm going to be sick. With jealousy

53. A girl behind me just yelled "it's my birthday too" and started crying. I feel bad for her.

54. Now Harry's talking to a nine year old boy who wants a girlfriend

55. That's weird Harry, he's only nine. Wait, so are all the girls here. Face palm.

56. Oh my god they're doing What Makes You Beautiful. What a great throwback to the good old days when they were a fivesome. Sniff

57. Now they are singing their new single Drag Me Down

58. How do all these twelve-year-olds know the words already?

59. It just came out two days ago and I didn't even like it that much

60. I'm a terrible Directioner

61. It sounds better live

62. And they leave the stage but I know it's not the end because last year they ended with loads of fireworks

63. Yes I came last year

64. Yes, by myself

65. Stop judging me

66. And they're back...

67. Wait has Liam done a costume change? No one else has changed clothes, just Liam.

68. I honesty believe "You&I" was written about me.

69. I LOVE YOU ONE DIRECTION!!

70. Wait what song are they going to finish on? They've played all the classics

71. Oh of course, Best Song Ever. It's the best song ever

72. Wait who's going to sing Zayn's parts?

73. Zayn has a high note in this. Who's going to sing it? Maybe Zayn will make a guest appearance. Maybe this is how he'll announce he's rejoining the band.

74. Maybe they'll just cut it out

75. This is killing me

76. Liam did the high note

77. It was actually quite good

78. I still miss Zayn

79. And it's over and all the teenagers around me rush forward to get a last glimpse of the boys as they leave

80. I can't believe it's over

81. I will come back every year to see this concert

82. By myself if I have to

83. Although if any boyfriend ever did volunteer to come with me, I'd have to marry him in the spot.

84. Maybe we could get married at the concert

85. Harry would definitely speak to me then

86. I love you One Direction

87. I still miss Zayn though

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